Sentinels
by Lalaith Quetzalli
Summary: -Companion and Side-story to FaD and BoR-. Protect, that was their mission, one they took great pride in. Either human or gifted, from threats within or without, they'd always fight to protect. They were Warriors, Protectors. But when all they've ever known is lost, how will they find their way again? When the shield breaks, and the sword bends, what can be done? (X-men xover)
1. The Shield

Hello my dear readers! Hope you all found your way here!

First of all, and to fulfill all protocols: I don't own anything from the MCU, yadda, yadda... This particular fics focuses mostly on Agents of SHIELD and a tad bit on Avengers and Captain America 2; and of course the events of my previous fics (the main timeline). I chose to make this a crossover with Thor because it was the only way to have Darcy as a main character and in a pairing. The pairings for this fic are: Phil/Darcy, Skyeward and FitzSimmons.

I will not be rewriting all of AoS (no way!), a lot will stay as it happened originally, except some key events, which you'll see here. Also, there are some references to Scandal, particularly where it comes to Darcy's family, you do not need to have seen the show to understand it, it's very light and not that important in the long run (though it will appear again later on).

This fic has two parts. Each narrated by a different character. You will know who in the title of the chapter itself. Both chapters are written in first person, by the character mentioned on the title and there will be no POV change through it.

I think that's enough to go for now. Hope you'll enjoy this fic (we'll be going back to Bouquet of Roses in two weeks).

* * *

Sentinels

(Companion and Sidestory to _Fate and Destiny_ and _Bouquet of Roses_ )

 _By: Lalaith Quetzalli_

 _Protect, that was their mission, one they took great pride in. Either human or gifted, from threats within or without, they'd always fight to protect. They were Warriors, Protectors. But when all they've ever known is lost, how will they find their way again? When the shield breaks, and the sword bends, what can be done?_

 **The Shield (Darcy)**

Most people think my story began in late Spring of 2011, when I was twenty five, close to graduating with a major in Political Sciences (and a minor in history because, why not?), doing an internship for six science credits with Dr. Jane Foster, Astrophysicist, in New Mexico; only to end up being at least partially responsible for half-running over a blonde hunk of a man who turned out to be a freaking god! Who knew?

Truth be told, and as insane and life changing as that event was, it wasn't really the first odd thing that happened to me. Strictly speaking, I've been odd since the moment I was born, it's scientific fact too! It's in my genes, I am a mutant, after all.

When I was young I was good at going unnoticed, didn't think there was anything special about that, though. My father walked out on my mom and I when I was very young, and for the longest time I didn't know why. There were all kinds of rumors, that maybe he'd cheated on my mom, or perhaps she cheated on him and I wasn't his, or perhaps he simply didn't want to be a father... most seemed to imply that it was my fault, and the fact that mom didn't seem to like me much, most of the time didn't do much for denying that.

The only person I really had while growing up was Livvie. She was my cousin, seven years older than me, her mom was my dad's sister. She was my hero, my role model, for many years I was convinced I'd follow in her footsteps; she always knew she wanted to be a lawyer, and I kept telling myself I would study law and go work with her and we'd be awesome together (that might still have been possible when I studied politics... but well, other things happened, like Jane and Thor and... yeah). I really liked Aunt Maya, she and mom worked together (Aunt Maya was a lawyer, while mom was an assistant in the firm), and even though Uncle Eli was a bit of a bore, what with working at the Smithsonian and liking boring things meant for old people (or at least that's what I used to believe when I was young), I thought he was nice too.

Dad was in some kind of accident when I was like three or four, I'm not sure what happened exactly, but he lost his job afterward and began drinking... a lot. He could be bad, sometimes, when he was drinking. So I'd go to my room and curl into a ball in a corner, and hope he wouldn't know I was there, and somehow he never found me.

When I was five and Livvie twelve, Aunt Maya had to go to London for a job. Mom was really happy, because her bosses were giving her a chance to get a better job, if she did good while Aunt Maya was away. And then something happened, the plane Aunt Maya was in fell, and then she was gone, and then dad was gone too. He didn't say anything, he just left.

Uncle Eli didn't seem to like Mom or I anymore afterwards, and for the longest time I didn't get the reason why. He wouldn't allow us to visit anymore, or for Livvie to visit us. And then Liv went to boarding school, and I didn't see her for many years.

I was twelve years old the first time I successfully hacked a government database. I'd been trying to find information about my dad and where he might have gone, but for the most part George Lewis didn't seem to exist at all. And then I found him, found his picture, that name, along with a list of at least half a dozen others... he was enlisted as an 'enemy of the state', he was also a presumed terrorist, believed to have been involved with the plane crash of 1991...

I was horrified by my discovery, so much I didn't want to see anyone, or for anyone to see me... I could have never imagined the consequences that childish desire of mine would have.

I didn't go to school for a whole week, and I was practically waiting for my mom to get the call from my teacher, telling her I had been absent all week, waiting for my mom to go find me so I could confront her with what I'd discovered. Except that once she got the call, and went to see me, she didn't seem to be able to see me at all. At first I thought she was just angry with me and ignoring my words, until she went and called the police to report me missing. It was a mess.

Perhaps the only good thing in that whole sequence of events, was when I met him: Professor X, also known as Charles Xavier, headmaster of a school for freaks (gifted, they prefer the term gifted... and deep down I do too).

As it turned out my mutation had manifested (or finished manifesting) as I wished not to be seen, and it made it so effectively no one could. Since I didn't know I was doing anything at all, I couldn't stop it. Destiny, another mutant, with the gift to see the future, had seen me and my situation, and was the one to inform the others, and so they went looking for me in my hometown of Bethesda, Maryland.

At my own request, my mother was never informed of my status as a mutant, or the truth about the Xavier Institute. She was just told (like many other human parents of mutant children, as I later found out), that I'd been chosen to be the recipient of one of their scholarships. I studied middle-school and high-school at the Institute, and I got to meet a lot of very interesting people: like Miss Sirin, my Eighth grade teacher who could actually fly (I wished I could), and Nina Reynolds, who was two years older than me and could talk to animals, and convinced them to let some of us pet them (I'd never imagined petting a baby vixen, it was awesome), Mystique could make herself look like anyone and liked to play all kinds of pranks (though she and Miss Destiny, her partner, had left to make their own school before I arrived), and of course Professor X and Mr. Eisenhardt were pretty awesome too.

I also learned all I could about the legend that was the Rose of Chaos, though around the Institute they called her either ChaosRose or Miss Alfdis, she was apparently Mr. Eisenhardt's daughter, and Nina's aunt. She had been the music teacher at the Institute, but had left almost a decade before I arrived (I was curious about the reason, but everyone seemed to be very hush-hush about it all, all I knew was that someone had died...). Still, I thought she was an amazing person, if even half of what was said about her was true (the things she had done in Paris, Africa, and many other places around the world), she was totally my hero. Then again, she was a hero to a hell of a lot of people, both in the Institute, and beyond it (so that probably wasn't surprising), I wished she'd still been in Westchester, so I could have met her... perhaps one day I would...

Days before my high-school graduation I was called into Professor X's office. It was perfectly normal, something he did for all his graduating students, as he presented them their options. I could get my diploma, rejoin society (it'd be up to me if I went to college, got a job or anything else), if I signed a contract committing myself to working for the Institute they offered to help pay my way through college.

I really wanted that, by that point it'd been more than a decade since I'd last seen Livvie, my old dream of one day being a famous lawyer and working with her had long since vanished into the ether and yet... Mom was sick, I'd just found out, and I knew she felt like I was abandoning her, spending so much time around the Institute (sometimes even the breaks when other kids would visit their families). She wasn't my favorite person, but she was all the family I'd left, and I just wasn't ready to give up on her.

Also, if I was honest with myself, I didn't see what I had to offer the X-Men, or even the Institute. My mutation was nothing extraordinary (though I suppose some would consider managing to go unnoticed with my rather... top-heavy body to be quite an achievement...), my classmates had given me the name of Wallflower (it was a sort-of tradition, to take a new name, depending on one's gift, and it was almost always chosen by those around us, either our peers, or mentors). We all knew the story of how Mystique had named the first generation...

In any case, being a Wallflower wasn't that extraordinary, from my point of view. So in the end I thanked Professor X for everything he'd done for me, then I packed my bags and went back home. It didn't take long after my arrival to learn that things were actually worse than I'd known them to be. Mom had cancer, breast cancer, had had it for years, and she hadn't said a thing. I probably wouldn't have known at all if she hadn't been in the hospital the day I got to Bethesda (I hadn't worried when she wasn't there to pick me up from the airport, thinking she just hadn't bothered to go get me...).

Those were some trying months. Mom's moods towards me seemed to fluctuate rather violently; one moment she'd be blaming me for my father leaving, claim I'd abandoned her to go study at my 'posh little school', that I didn't love her anymore, one time she even yelled that I had been the worst mistake of her life (that one was especially hard, I knew that I'd been the result of an unplanned pregnancy; mom had been in law school, had to drop out to marry dad and have me, and that was why it'd taken her so long to make it to a lawyer and not just a paralegal in the firm)... then she suddenly would begin mumbling apologies for dad, for her own neglect, swear that she loved me and I was the greatest gift life ever gave her... If I were to be honest to myself I'd have to admit that to the day she died I never knew for sure which of all those statements were the delusions caused by the cancer and the meds she was on to help keep her as comfortable as possible, and which were simply truths she couldn't hold back anymore.

Perhaps the greatest shock in my whole life, was the visit I got on the day of mom's funeral. I was walking out of the graveyard after the service was finished, when a black nondescript car stopped just in front of me, the window rolled down and I had to blink to convince myself that the man inside it was really who I thought it was: Uncle Eli...

He didn't say a word when I got into the car (and even I'm not quite sure why exactly I got into it in the first place), nothing until the car stopped again, right outside mom's place.. my place. Then he pulled a plastic envelope out of... somewhere and handed it over, told me inside was all the information for a trust fund in my name, that I should use it, go to college, make a life for myself. I was so shocked I couldn't even speak. Then he added there was also a card for a realtor, who'd help me with the sell of the house, if I decided to go study elsewhere.

I got out of the car silently, still trying to make my brain fully process what was going on (I'm not even sure if I thanked him). He nodded at me once, and then the car took him away. I didn't need him to tell me it was the last time we'd be seeing each other... I will never know for sure why exactly he gave me all that money, was it some kind of penance for abandoning me and my mom when I was little? Did he know about my dad being in that FBI list? Was that why he'd forbidden Livvie and I from playing together anymore? And if so, why help me then, after so many years? It wasn't like he owed me anything... right?

In the end I did move away, but I didn't sell the house. Instead I rented it out, deciding it might be a good idea to have somewhere to go, in the future, if I ever needed it, just in case. So I packed my bags and traveled to Willowdale, Virginia, to Culver University.

I began studying law, but after a year decided it really wasn't my thing after all. I changed majors three times before settling onto Political Sciences, with some History for my minor; I also studied as many languages as I could during the six years I spent attending college (the account had enough money to cover tuition, board and expenses during that time). And then, as I finally was about to graduate... six science credits got in my way!

I hadn't the slightest idea how that had happened exactly. Granted, I didn't like sciences much, and I remember putting off taking such subjects the first couple of years, as I focused instead in choosing my major... but I had to have taken some of the right subjects eventually, right? Apparently not. I was almost going nuts, because I so did not want to have to stay another full term in Culver studying nothing but sciences! It would have been my worst nightmare come true (and I find it shocking, years later, to think that there was a time when I saw such things as the worst that could ever happen... I had no idea...).

When I first went to meet Dr. Foster about the internship I didn't know what to expect, exactly. Though I certainly thought there would be some complications. I was no scientist, knew nothing at all about astrophysics (I barely even knew the names of some constellations, and the zodiac signs, though I doubted the last one counted). I certainly wasn't expecting there to be no other applicants. Once again, I didn't know near enough science to realize that as fantastical as Jane's whole research sounded to me, most saw her work as nothing more than a joke.

It was supposed to be easy, just a few months working with her in Puente Antiguo, New Mexico (also known as the butt-end-of-nowhere), helping her collate information, file things, chase a few storms, make sure she ate, slept and showered every so often (really, some of it sounded more like babysitting than assisting, but still). And then a man fell out of the sky, and neither Jane's nor my life were ever the same.

 **xXx**

When I was first invited to join SHIELD I said no (hell no!). It was well known that while there had been something of a truce between mutants (the X-Men mainly) and SHIELD, it had ended sometime during the nineties. There were also rumors about SHIELD turning away prospective candidates following some kind of high-tech screening. I had no intention of exposing myself like that; while I was in no way ashamed or afraid of being a mutant, I also didn't see the point of revealing myself if it wasn't necessary.

They weren't too insistent, which I wasn't sure if I should find demeaning or reassuring (it would not be until much, much later that I'd learn that a certain someone had pretty much put his hands on the fire for me, assuring his superiors that I was no security concern, despite my youth, and seemingly disdainful attitude where it came to figures of authority... or my presumed father -because George Lewis had only been an alias, they had no pictures of him, only drawings, and mom had destroyed all the pictures we had, so there was no way for them to be sure he was the same man in their lists-).

Then I met Silbhé... I knew who she was from the start, at least in the sense others did. The genius girl from Norwich. Her chosen majors might not have been what most of Culver's students preferred but no one could deny the achievement of someone earning three Master Degrees at nineteen, and then there were all the languages. I especially admired that. I myself was fluent in English, Spanish, French, and knew just a bit of Russian and Chinese (mostly for variety). We got along just fine, even being so different. She was so nice, infinitely patient and kind.

I got angry sometimes, seeing the way some of the minions acted around her, seeing her work as less. Of course those were the people who did not understand why her work was so important, they hadn't been there when first MewMew, then Thor, and then his friends and the huge-ass monster had landed, hadn't seen the destruction they could cause... still, I was angry:

"It's okay Darcy." She told me one day, when I came close to snapping. "They are ignorant, that doesn't make them evil. Also, one thing you need to understand, is that knowledge is power. And power is a currency everyone understands, many want it, and even more fear it, especially when its in the hands of others. I have knowledge, which means I have power, not everyone likes that. I understand that, I did so before I ever came to work for SHIELD. It's not my job to make people change their minds about any of it. All I can do is give them the tools to combat their own ignorance, the rest is up to them."

"But the way they insult you," I couldn't help but insist. "The way they look down on you."

"I've always been looked down on, I am quite small after all..." She laughed.

That particular conversation/argument ended there, it was hard to hold onto a bad mood when she laughed. There was something about her laughter, about her smiles, her sheer joy that made it hard to be anything other than happy around her. Still, a part of me didn't quite understand how she could be so accepting, so at peace with everything... and then I realized I wasn't seeing the whole picture, and once I did... oh boy!

When Silbhé first mentioned her boyfriend... well, actually she never called him her boyfriend, she always referred to him as her Maverick, her love, her 'insert-lovey-dovey-word-here', the specific term didn't matter much, only the 'her' seemed to be truly important. I actually wasn't the first one to notice that, it was Jane, who thought it was quite possessive, almost medieval of Silbhé (of course, after meeting the love in question, a lot became much clearer).

That one time I saw Luka, before I actually knew who he was, all I could think about him was: he was extremely hot and Silbhé was a very lucky girl. When the sky opened, aliens poured out, NY became ground zero for an honest-to-god alien-battle and we finally got to return and see for ourselves the consequences of it all, when I saw him and realized that Luka Hvedrungr, the Maverick, was in fact Loki of Asgard, Thor's little brother, the same who'd sent the Destroyer to New Mexico, and who'd lead an alien invasion on our planet just the day before... my brain actually froze. I wasn't hateful, or horrified, I probably should have been, I know a lot of people were, but I was too busy trying to connect Silbhé, my friend, the girl I knew and admired almost like an older sister (even though she was years younger than me), with him. She wasn't stupid, not in any possible sense of the word; which, at least in my book, meant that if she loved him as much as she obviously did, there had been something good about him. I held onto that belief, even when others found out and gave them hell about it, and I never regretted it.

With Jane and I having been pretty much 'relocated' to Stark Tower I had even more scientists to wrangle, but JARVIS was a great help, and Bruce had at least some degree of self-preservation, which was a good thing. Coulson also somehow managed to cajole me into learning some self-defense, which at some point turned into being taught to defend myself by none other than Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow herself!

We were a family; nuttier than squirrel shit, probably more dysfunctional than all of our bio-families combined, together we'd enough quirks and issues to probably send a dozen of the best therapists and psychiatrists straight to the loony bin, but we were most certainly a family: by choice, and word and actions... not the least because Tony one day had said, in front of half the press, that I was his daughter (then again by that point they'd been harassing both of us more than half the night, and there had been gossip, both in and out of the media, about me possibly being either a hooker or simply a gold-digger seeking to destroy the golden-couple that were him and Pepper... as if I'd be crazy enough get between Pepper Potts and her man! That woman frightened me more than even Natasha!). Jane had told me she loved me as a sister more than once, and Silbhé seemed to be only too happy to be part of our little group; all the Avengers acted like quarreling siblings whenever off duty; except, of course, for Clint and Natasha with each other, because there was nothing sibling-ly about their relationship, they were together, had been for a long time, then again, the fact that we knew about their relationship, that they didn't hide it from us all was telling in and of its own.

We were a family, and Thanos and its Chitauri destroyed that. It wasn't just the second invasion (we were actually on top of our game on that one, managed to make it happen far away from civilians and civilization in general, to prevent collateral damage, and SHIELD won, of course). No, the real problem, was when Silbhé died, and it was all the Titan's fault. She died, and just like that, our family shattered.

I realize that we probably weren't a very strong family unit, if the loss of one person was enough to break us all into pieces, but still, it was unexpected, and it hurt. It's quite possible that even losing mom hadn't hurt me as much... even more painful was seeing Loki, his loss, his grief, his rage, he was so completely broken and none of us had the slightest idea what to do, how to help... if anything could be done to help at all.

And then the funeral passed, Thor and Loki were gone, Jane went back to her work, and everyone else began going their own way, and I had no idea what to do. Jane didn't need me, hadn't needed me for a while, not really; and, if I was honest with myself, I didn't feel up to being her assistant anyway, doing so would only have reminded me of Silbhé and the hole she left behind. So when Phil approached me and invited me to SHIELD for the second time, I said yes. I didn't even think about it; which meant that afterwards I needed to do a lot of planning, and even a fair bit of hacking, to make sure that my secrets would stay that way (mine and secret). But somehow it all worked out just fine.

Thanks to all the informal training I'd already been through I never did go through SHIELD's academy, but straight to trainee. I went from that to junior agent, minion (though I was much cooler than the others), assistant, and then partner, in record time. Which, of course, didn't sit too well with a number of people. There were those who, when they looked at me, always the first thing they saw was my rack, and it was as if they believed that having big breasts automatically meant having a smaller brain (absolutely stupid), and then they refused to believe that I could possibly be a competent woman and agent, that I could have made it as far as I did on my own ability, rather than my body. But I didn't curse them for their ignorance, I'd learned better than that from Silbhé; I just smiled my political smile for them and waited for the right moment to show them how wrong they were.

February 2nd of 2014 was a day we'd probably all remember our whole lives. Close to a year since the day we'd lost Silbhé, and we were all invited to a party. Not all of us recognized the manor when we were teleported there by the magical invitations (which were obviously Loki's work), but those of us who did... it was hard. It was also probably a good thing some of us were allowed to arrive before the majority of the others, have things explained to us... I cannot imagine the strop Jane would have been in, if she hadn't been told ahead, and I... I have no idea how I myself would have reacted.

Silbhé was back, she was alive (or at least not dead), and our family slowly began healing.

I might never know for sure when exactly I fell in love, I was halfway there before I knew I'd begun. He went (in my head) from 'Agent iPod-Thief' to 'Agent Ninja', to Agent Coulson, to Coulson, to Phil, almost faster than I went from Jane's intern to his partner...

It wasn't as simple as it might sound (because this is my life, and of course things can never be easy). He was with another, when we first met. A beautiful cellist called Audrey Nathan. He told me once he'd saved her from an enhanced obsessed with her. He was her savior, her knight in dashing suit... and she fell in love with him. I could believe that. I don't know when exactly things went so wrong between the two of them, it was after the invasion in New York, but probably before the second battle against the Chitauri the following year. All he ever said about it was that she couldn't handle it, the not knowing: not knowing where he was, if he was safe or in danger, if he was sitting behind a desk, traveling, or fighting for his life, if he was even alive or some mission, some enemy, had claimed his life. It was simply too much, too stressful for her. And he knew it, could see it in the shadows underneath her eyes, in the redness in them, in the tension in her shoulders... She loved him, but she couldn't handle the stress of being with him. And so they broke it off.

I kept an eye on her, though I never told him. When, later on, an announcement came out for her engagement to famous composer and maestro of the Philharmonic Orchestra: August Rush. When I saw him put more sugar in his coffee than was at all natural for him I knew that he'd heard the news too; so I took care to buy a few of the butter-caramel candies he favored and leave them almost carelessly on his desk after handing him some paperwork. The next day when I came in I found a packet of my favorite triple chocolate brownies (the best ever, from a small bakery several blocks from the office). There was no note, and he didn't say a word, but I understood, and so did he, we preferred it that way.

It started as going for lunch together... well, actually it started as having lunch together in his office. Whenever I noticed he seemed to have too much work, I would pop over to the mess hall and get something for both of us, then take it to him, and then I actually stayed in his office to make sure he ate rather than push it aside in favor of working some more (he was the kind to do that). Then one night, when we both ended staying late dealing with some paperwork a few of the minions had been much too late delivering (he'd insisted it was his responsibility, but I just hated leaving him alone), when we were finally finished he offered to buy me dinner to make it up to me, and we ended eating probably the best Indian food I've ever tried, in a small family restaurant I would have never even seen if he hadn't pointed it out to me.

A point came when we were having lunch together more times a week than not; and then he began suggesting we go eat somewhere, with the excuse that he was in the mood from something other than what they had in the mess. He began inviting me to dinner whenever we stayed late, and then even when we didn't, if we happened to be leaving the building at the same time (which, again, was more times than not). I was so at ease with him, with it all, I probably wouldn't have realized what was really going on if someone hadn't pointed it out to me (well, that's probably putting it nicely, but still).

I was working my frustrations out on a punching bag (some of the secretaries had been gossiping about me and complaining about how they couldn't possibly compete against me and my 'assets'), while it wasn't exactly new, and all agents that got to work with me sooner or later realized I had the skills to be an agent, and came to respect me; it still hurt sometimes. Especially because the most recent mission had been particularly hard, I had some scraps and bruises, but Phil had ended with a dislocated arm and a concussion. And that had been just the start of the real problem, he'd dislocated the shoulder of his dominant arm, and that, added to the concussion, meant that he was completely dependent on me to keep the both of us alive until we were extracted. I did it, and a part of me had always known I could do it, but that didn't make the twelve minutes we had to wait for that extraction any less stressful.

It was shocking, really, because even when I'd finally given in and joined SHIELD, even when I surrendered to Phil's insistence that I be trained to fight, even though I was originally supposed to be nothing more than an office minion; I never expected to be good at it. At fighting, hand-to-hand, and my aim was quite good, if I did say so myself. I hated actual guns with a passion, bullets and all that, had ever since the day I happened to be in a restaurant when a bunch of armed thugs went in and mugged us all. Someone had tried to fight back and there had been shots fired. I could still remember the sound of those, of the bullet lodging itself into the man, and the girl beside him, his girlfriend probably, screaming hysterically. Still, I was quite handy with a taser, and while I was living in Stark Tower (or actually, Avengers Tower), Tony had taken to creating first a gun that shot electric charges (almost like bullets made of pure electricity), a baton that sent out electroshocks from both ends (that one being more for a lark, as it wasn't really that practical), and finally there had been two small rods, they looked almost like chopsticks, except they had a black, metallic shine to it, and when activated I could use them to shock others too.

So, most of the time I had my handy little taser (it looked like the commercial models, but had been modified so I could change the voltage depending on what was going on), and on missions I also had my electro-gun in a holster on my hip (it even looked like a normal gun), and my two shocking-sticks (which I kept inside my combat boots).

In any case, there had been a time, when I first became a field-agent, when I wondered if perhaps I'd missed my calling, maybe I should have taken the opportunity and become an X-Man when I graduated high-school. Though, if I'd done that I would have never met Phil; not Coulson, not the facade he kept before everyone else, but Phil, the funny, teasing, courageous, gentlemanly, amazing man he only showed before those he trusted (and I was so lucky to be one of them).

So I was trying to work out my frustrations on the punching bag, when suddenly there was a hand on my shoulder. I reacted instinctively, twisting around and delivering a punch, followed by a roundhouse kick. Natasha of course evaded both quite easily; but instead of either apologizing for surprising me, or chewing me out for trying to hit her, she threw a punch at my head. And then we were off.

Five minutes later I was on my back on a mat, halfway across the gym, panting and unable to so much as sit up. (Wasn't sure if I should feel proud I managed to last all of five minutes against the Black Widow, or angry that I hadn't managed more...).

"You shouldn't give so much importance to what a bunch of mean, weak, jealous secretaries say." Natasha commented evenly, crouching beside me.

She didn't look tired in the slightest, had barely broken a sweat. Though I did notice a forming bruise high on her left shoulder, and a very small cut near the end of her right eyebrow, I'd managed at least two good hits.

"The secretaries was just, sorta, the straw that broke the camel's back, or whatever." I babbled, not quite sure why I was saying all that, but doing it nonetheless. "It's the fucking mission that left me wound up tighter than a constrictor knot, and more jittery than a druggy coming down from a high."

I noticed the way Natasha's eyes sharpened, probably wondering about my choice of metaphors. I just shrugged; so I'd had a boyfriend who was a boy-scout, and he was so proud of all the kind of knots he could do (there was also some kinky shit involved... but that was a whole other thing); as for the other thing... I'd never tried drugs, but I'd seen more than one person, both high and coming down from it, especially when I'd lived near DC.

"You kept yourself and your partner safe, what else could you have done?" I wasn't sure if the question was rhetorical or not, I still tried to answer it though.

"Kept him from being injured in the first place?" I offered.

"You performed to the best of your abilities." I wasn't sure if that was supposed to be a comfort or an accusation. "Of course those can be improved, but so can everyone else's. Had you tried to go beyond your abilities, you might have ended hurt instead, perhaps even worse so than he... That would have been stupid, Phil isn't partnered with stupid people... I don't train stupid people. Have I made myself clear?"

I just nodded quietly, not sure what, if anything, should be said.

"Phil has been asking for you." Natasha announced, rather calmly, as she stood. "He's also likely to be hungry, and I doubt he'll enjoy the food he'll have available in the infirmary."

I didn't need her to be any more direct than that, even as I forced myself to sit up I was already considering which of the places we'd gone to that were close to the offices might still be open, and which one he might prefer...

It was until after I was stepping out of the communal showers, having washed off the sweat and dressed in some more comfy clothes (usually I'd have gone to the tower and showered there, but Phil wouldn't be leaving SHIELD's infirmary until the next day, and I wasn't leaving without seeing him (and I wasn't about to go see him all sweaty and gross); I had finally made up my mind of a little Thai place a couple of blocks away, when it suddenly hit me, just how odd the whole exchange with Natasha actually was. It also occurred to me that I'd probably just gone through the Black Widow's version of the 'shovel talk', and I'd passed (seeing how I was still alive and all), I almost broke into hysterical giggles at the realization.

Still, when I finally got in to see Phil (after some clever talking so they wouldn't confiscate the take-out), I placed the bag on the little table beside his bed, and before he could say a single word I bent and kissed him, full on the mouth. Phil just smiled.

And that was, more or less, how we started dating.

We kept it to ourselves at first, for a little while. It wasn't like we were afraid, or doubtful about our relationship, we just had no intention of dealing with people's reactions. At least that was the excuse; until we eventually realized that in the end it was still our relationship, our lives and, while we never made any sort of announcement, we eventually simply stopped hiding it.

There was some shock. Silbhé and Loki (who'd recently returned) looked happy for us, though I'm quite sure that at some point Loki had a 'talk' with Phil (he didn't say anything, but there was something about the looks the two exchanged over the course of a few days after our relationship became public knowledge...). Clint teased Phil good-naturedly and Natasha just stood silent, the slightest hint of a smile on her face. The rest either congratulated us or simply ignored the whole thing. Tony was the only one that didn't seem to take it well.

"He's twice your age Darcy..." Tony began.

"He's not!" I snapped at him. "Yes, he's older than me but..."

"He could be your father!" Tony insisted.

"But he's not!" I retorted, and then, before I could think better of it: "And neither are you!"

It was a bit of a mess, really. It had actually started as a joke. Back when I'd first lived in Stark Tower (when I'd moved in with Jane and Erik), some crazy paps had taken a lot of pics of me around the place, and with everyone, and all kinds of rumors had started. When Tony threw some big-ass party I had reporters hounding me half the night trying to get a scoop, to find out who I really was, and why I was there. Then, right as I was about to finally lose it and taser someone to kingdom come, Tony had come out of nowhere, put a hand around my shoulders, then turned and demanded to know why the other man was harassing his daughter...

It was supposed to be a joke, or just something to get him off me. But the bastard had actually taken it seriously, he'd run with the story, and after that everyone began believing I really was Tony's daughter. Which was absolutely ridiculous because he was like sixteen when I was born, and while it wasn't exactly impossible, I couldn't see how people failed to realize that if Tony Stark had had a child at that age they'd have known back then, and not twenty-something years later! Then again, considering how Howard's own little sister: Arianna, hadn't become known by the public until she was already twenty and married to Luke Serrure...

It got to the point where even SHIELD began believing the lie. (I'd the habit of regularly hacking SHIELD's file on me, I saw when they erased their suspicions of my being connected to the 'alleged terrorist' George Lewis, and instead registered me as 'presumed illegitimate daughter of Anthony Stark'). Really, there had been no official inquires, no DNA tests, and yet they were all buying it. They were supposed to be an intelligence agency, and yet they were allowing rumors to take precedence... it honestly baffled me.

It had started that way but, somehow, at some point, it had stopped being a game, a joke. I began teasing Tony, always using our supposed relationship either as the joke or the justification; and he returned it all, blow by blow. Pepper would just roll her eyes at both of us, at times even saying how she wasn't sure the world would survive us both.

I never told Tony, but a part of me lit up at his claiming of me; because for the first time since my mom died I had a real family again; and what was more, for the first time in quite possibly my whole life I had a parent who actually wanted me, liked me... loved me.

Tony swayed back as I said those words, and I could see the hurt that went through his eyes for a moment before his mask fell in place.

"True, you may go now Miss Lewis." He stated coldly.

I was the one who felt like I'd just received a blow then. I turned around, and for a moment I actually considered leaving, I really did. But deep down I knew that if I left, our relationship, it'd be all ruined. Beyond the whole father-daughter thing, our most basic connection, would be lost. So I turned around again and stood my ground.

"Did you know that my father... my birth-father I mean, walked out on my mom and me when I was five?" I asked, not quite knowing just yet where I was going with all that. "His name is, or was, George Lewis... You know, I have no idea if he's even alive still. I was twelve years old when I first hacked into the FBI database, and I discovered that there was an alleged terrorist who was believed to have been called George Lewis at one point..."

"What...?!" That certainly called Tony's attention.

"I'd been trying to find my dad since I first learned how to use a computer." I elaborated. "But it was like he didn't exist. Like George Lewis had never existed." I shook my head. "Him walking out on us, and me never being sure if mom ever wanted me... I don't like talking about it, I really don't. But I know it has affected me. When you told that reporter I was your daughter... at first it seemed like a really good joke, you know? And then everyone began buying it, the people out there, and in SHIELD, and even the others right in this tower!" My voice turned quieter. "And suddenly it wasn't a joke anymore, it wasn't all for laugh. Because I liked it, you know? I liked people believing you were my dad. And it wasn't because you're rich, and cool, and famous... No, it was because you wanted me..."

"Oh Darcy..." He embraced me, and then I was crying. "I will always want you Darce, a man needs to be stupid not to want you..."

"Thank you..." There really was nothing more to say.

I did have to tell him that I loved Phil, and I was still moving out of the floor he'd given me and into his (it was still in the tower, but still). At least, he was more willing to listen then; I got the feeling that he still didn't understand it, not really. But he respected me, and he respected the fact that I loved Phil, and he did love me.

 **xXx**

Months later Phil died... or at least that's what everyone was lead to believe.

We'd married in mid-summer, secretly, after a failed mission in Ireland. The town we were in happened to be pagan, they even had a priestess, and it was she who married us. We'd decided at one point not to marry legally; as such actions would have required us to register that union with SHIELD. The rules of non-fraternization would have kept us from working together in the future, and there was no way either of us would ever allow that. In all of SHIELD Nick was the only one who knew for sure that we were together; and he only knew because he was a good friend of Phil's... Natasha and Clint knew too, but by that point they were more Avengers than Agents. They were two of the witnesses to our handfasting ceremony, with Loki and Nightingale being the other two. They just happened to be there that day, like some kind of cosmic accident (later on I'd learn that while it was, indeed, a coincidence, there was more to it than I ever imagined).

Things had been getting more and more complicated. There was a new group trying to create super-soldiers (really, did the messes with the Hulk and Extremis, that last one less than a year before, had taught them nothing at all? Apparently not). He would be away for long periods of time, following what trails either of us could find. No one but Fury and I even knew what he was doing (and, technically, I wasn't supposed to know as much as I did).

When he went off grid at the end of October I didn't worry much about it. It had happened before, and I knew that if he died, I'd feel it. It was part of the magic in the nifty little rings Natasha and Clint had gifted us, and Loki and Nightingale had spelled for us, the day of our wedding. If something, anything, happened to one of us, the other would know... It was how I knew when things went absolutely, terribly wrong on the third of November. The only reason why I didn't lose it completely in the middle of a hall in SHIELD HQ was because, even as I felt Phil's pain, I still felt his heartbeat; he was hurt, badly hurt even, but he was still alive. Still, I've never hated anything more than realizing there was nothing I could do, nothing but pray my love would survive and return to me... because I honestly had no idea what I'd do if he didn't.

It took one week, possibly the longest week of my life, but finally my personal phone rang. The number was unknown, but that didn't stop me, few enough people had that number, his name came tumbling from my lips the moment I heard his own voice whisper mine...

It took another week for him to make it all the way back to me, in absolute secrecy. SHIELD had already declared him MIA and were about ready to change that status to KIA... which I realized was odd, once I calmed down and looked back on it. Using several convenient excuses I left the tower and met Phil in New Jersey, the house that had once belonged to his mother, it was his top-secret safehouse (the one that wasn't in any of his files... much like my mom's own place back in Bethesda). I didn't realize how much the previous two weeks had truly affected me, how much I'd been keeping in, until I saw him and then I collapsed and broke into tears. Phil didn't say a word, he just held me tight in his arms, waiting for me to put myself back together.

The moment I stopped crying I kissed him. There was a sudden hunger in me, which nothing but him could satiate. We didn't make it to the bedroom, and the bed until the second round, and we both lost count of how many times we came together that day. It wasn't even about the pleasure, about the orgasms, it was the intimacy, the knowledge that we were both there, that we were together, nothing could have possibly compared to that.

Nick paid us a visit the next day, and together the three of us made a plan. I could tell the boss did not exactly agree with me being there. I didn't say a thing, just waited; however, when he insisted on that matter one too many times, Phil abruptly seemed to lose his patience, as he pulled at the chain around his neck hard enough to make it snap, slipping the circular band off it before almost forcefully placing it on the table in between us. More slowly, but just as pointedly, I unclasped the necklace around my own throat and placed my band beside his.

Nick blinked, and I could tell that (for perhaps the first time in his life) he was honestly shocked.

"When did this happen?" He asked quietly.

"A few months ago, in Ireland." Phil told him evenly. "It was a handfasting ceremony. It has no legal standing, but then again that was done on purpose. We knew what would happen if SHIELD ever knew about us."

"And yet you're telling me..." Nick muttered.

"Because you need to understand why she's here, and why she's staying here." My love explained to his boss and best-friend. "I know you Nick, I've known you a long time. I imagine you'll be in no hurry to change my status back to alive, you probably have already thought of a way to use that in your favor... I'm not against that. I can see how it could be beneficial to our work, our enemies will not expect us if they believe me to be dead. I'm willing to play the part... but Darcy will be kept in the loop. She's my wife, and while I imagine she will not be able to come with me as it would call the wrong kind of attention, and I need to know that someone I trust is left to handle my old duties. She will know what's going on at all times, you will not keep us apart Nick. I'm not willing to lose Darcy, not for SHIELD, and not for you. You may be my best friend Nick, and I respect you greatly, but Darcy's the love of my life, and always will be."

I'm sure that in that moment I must have been so red I came close to glowing... and yet, I knew I shared his feelings to the exact same degree. Which was why I didn't back down, didn't look away in embarrassment or anything like that, instead I twined our fingers together and looked straight at Nick, waiting for a plan to be made. Of course, Nick had already thought of something, I expected no less. He even managed to include me with little hassle.

And so began the biggest charade of my life. As far as everyone in the world but Nick Fury (and eventually my love's new team) knew, Phil Coulson had died in the line of duty on November 3rd, his body had been lost in the Mediterranean. The downside? The Avengers had all known about our relationship, so of course they were all always popping in, offering their condolences, not wanting to leave me to grieve alone (Jane was the worst)... and I had to pretend to grieve. I had to be perfect at it too, I knew Phil's life could end depending on it. It's also why I eventually moved out; though my excuse was that as Phil's appointed successor I had a lot of work to do, and the Tower was too far away from the offices. I might be able to move back once I got a better handle on my new duties, but until then I'd be living in a SHIELD issue apartment. I knew most thought I was doing it to get away from Phil's memory, and that didn't exactly hurt our cover, so I didn't try to change their minds.

Another interesting thing happened right then. While I'd technically been Phil's assistant, and later on his partner, and that meant I had accessed to a lot of highly-classified information... truth was I had never been officially given the necessary levels for it. Phil let me see it all, Nick knew about it and simply didn't say a thing. Maria Hill didn't like it much, but she didn't fight the others on it. As Fury explained to me, to be able to truly take Phil's post I'd have needed Level 8 clearance, at minimum. But going from low level (on paper I was barely Level 3, mostly because I'd been an agent for less than two years by that point) to one of the highest (above the known levels) would have called way too much attention, exactly the opposite of what we wanted. So Nick decided to instead twist things to his advantage (all of our advantages, really):

I became Agent Shadow. I had no official level, because I did not need it. I answered to no one except Fury himself, he was also the only one capable of overturning any order I might give. Finally, all my missions were considered top-secret, and I was free to come and go as I pleased, as long as I kept control of things. It was a freedom no one had ever had before, a trust I never expected Fury to give me. I knew he was only giving me that much leeway because of Phil; he knew that his situation was tricky, and if he ever got in a bind, I needed to be able to assist him without having to go through miles of red tape (especially because it'd have been tricky to explain why I needed to do something to help a man that was supposed to be dead...).

It still wasn't easy. For most of my duties Clint was my pilot (Natasha was kept busy, working with Steve and the STRIKE team). And yet I took the time, every other day, to make a private video call to my husband. If we were lucky we got the chance to chat for a while about what we'd done, perhaps even to be a little naughty... if we weren't we only got the chance to reassure each other and ourselves that we were okay and wish luck until the next call. I kept him informed on how Clint and Tasha were doing, and the rest of the Avengers; I also got to know a lot about his team, even if I didn't meet them face to face. I was quite sure May at least knew something was going on, but even she didn't know about me, or our connection.

In the end, my greatest secret wasn't my mutation (SHIELD still didn't know about that, not even Fury, though Phil did know, I'd told him the day before we married, not wanting to go into it with a secret like that); but no, in the end my greatest secret was the fact that I was a hacker, and not just that, but arguably the best hacker in the world. I went by the screen-name TaserQueen. Many organizations had tried to recruit me, especially both SHIELD and the Rising Tide, but I refused, I only hacked for myself, not for others, never that. I also had serious suspicions that the young hacker Phil had recruited in LA to join his team might be BlueCloud, the second best hacker in the world, but I wasn't sure, not until later.

Months after Phil got his new team, something began happening in Europe. We didn't know why, but Jane wanted to go see. By that point SHIELD wasn't as interested in her work anymore (they probably didn't see the point), so most of the crew that had been working for her in the recent past was gone. In part because of that, and in part because past experience said that if Jane suspected something was coming, it was a sure bet something was, Fury told me to go with her, keep an eye on things just in case. It was relatively easy to sell it to her as a case of homesickness, and I did miss her, so that helped too. Getting her a new intern, and one that proved to be able and willing to deal with the insanity that came with knowing and working with Jane was a plus in my book (even if he was a bit too insistent when flirting with me and didn't seem to get the point that I was simply not interested... how I wished I could have told him I was married, but that wasn't really a choice, regretfully).

I knew about the time traveling, of course, Phil had told me after returning to me. How someone had saved him, how Nightingale was there to heal him, yet she wasn't the Nightingale we had seen off at the beginning of the summer. And we'd already seen her, and Loki, in Ireland. I knew yet I didn't understand what exactly Phil had been talking about when he said there was an aura about them, that showed they weren't the same... and then when I met first Nightingale, and then Loki as they dealt with the disaster caused during the so-called Convergence, I understood. I could see the difference between the two helping around that day, and the ones who'd been present at my handfasting. They might have looked the same physically, for the most part, but there was a different aura about them; a changed sense of growth, of maturity, of balance...

I'm not quite sure why, but I found it extremely funny when they saw my wedding-band, sensed the magic in it, and didn't know it to be their own. It more than anything else confirmed they weren't exactly the same people, more than seventy years of time and experience separated them, I couldn't quite wrap my head around it.

By that point Fury had managed to keep Clint busy most of the time, and while I did miss him, he was a very good friend, it made things easier when it came to keeping in touch with Phil.

Being a Shadow inside SHIELD had both its difficulties and rewards. Soon enough everyone knew I was Agent Shadow, and essentially what it meant; didn't mean they had to like me. Some, like Victoria Hand, Jasper Sitwell and Robert Gonzales did not like me at all; others, like Isabelle Hartley, Felix Blake and a few more, thought I was simply too young, too inexperienced to have such authority and power.

It all came to a head eventually, like I knew it would. At the end of the Summer of 2015, less than eight weeks after the Convergence, I received a coded message from Phil; Ace Peterson had been taken, and an exchange was taking in a specific place and time. They couldn't call in help from HQ, but Phil wanted to know someone would have his team's back if it was necessary.

I was just leaving my apartment, when my phone rang, probably the oddest call I'd ever received (not exactly surprising, considering the caller was Irene Xavier-Darkholme, one of the heads of the Massachusetts Academy, and better known in some circles as Destiny):

"There is a bridge and it's on fire." She told me straight out, forgoing all greetings and usual pleasantries. "Will you brave the fire to save a life? A Warrior of Light will turn for the Dark, unless another intervenes, will you be the one? You're more than a Wallflower, will you leave the Shadow and step into the Light?"

I didn't quite understand what was going on, what she meant, and I never got the chance to ask either. Still, I was there, on that bridge. I saw Phil and Mike Peterson walk to where some of the highest ranked members of Centipede were waiting; the boy went to his father; and then the trap was sprung. Apparently it wasn't Peterson they wanted, but Phil. I almost broke cover right then and there; until I realized something: the bridge wasn't on fire yet. So I forced myself to wait. I watched Peterson hand his son over to a young woman: Skye, and then he was going back, he wanted to make things right.

I realized what was coming a fraction of a second before it happened. I didn't even think about it, I jumped from my hiding spot and ran across the bridge; had just reached Peterson's side, when the explosion rocked the whole bridge, I barely managed to take a hold on his arm and prayed that my suspicions were right, at the same time I flipped the mental switch on my mutation.

"Wha...?!" The man was obviously shocked, made a move to push me away.

"Don't!" I yelled at him, dodging his punch (which wasn't easy, as I couldn't let go of him). "Do not let go of me Mr. Peterson!"

"What are you doing?!" He demanded, obviously stressed out.

"I'm trying to save both our lives." I told him grimly.

It was hard, probably the hardest thing I've done in my life, to walk away from the bridge with Mr. Peterson, leaving my match in the hands of Centipede, leaving his team in the dirt. But I had to make sure Mike Peterson would be alright.

"Who are you?" He asked me once we got to the closest safe-house (one of Phil's, and also one SHIELD wasn't aware of).

"My name is Darcy Lewis." I told him honestly. "But you may call me Shadow."

"You're a gifted." He said, it wasn't a question.

"I am." I nodded.

"How did you know to be there?" He asked next, as if just realizing that. "You're not part of the team, are you? I hadn't met you before..."

"No, I'm not part of the team, but I'm a... friend, of Phil's, Agent Coulson." I clarified. "He told me what was going on. He couldn't call HQ but we have an encrypted method of communication, and he wanted to be sure that if something really went wrong someone would be there to help."

"Thank you miss." He nodded respectfully at me. "I owe you my life."

"I'm going to make sure you're safe, Mr. Peterson." I assured him. "You and your son."

"And your friend?" He inquired.

"I'll make sure the two of you are safe." I insisted. "And then I'm going after him."

"Let me help you." He replied. "You saved my life, it's only right."

We argued on it for a while, but eventually I had to admit he was right. We waited until May took the rest of the team to a rendezvous point, and when Ace Peterson was sent away with a guard I hacked in and changed the orders, making them deliver the boy to a safe-house and leave him there (so we could pick him up). I wasn't sure if it was a sign of how well-trained all agents were, or that there was something intrinsically wrong in SHIELD when no one questioned the orders, and no one tried to stay with the boy...

By then I'd also managed to track down the aunt already. Mindy Peterson and her daughter Kisha were already with us, and I was making arrangements for them to have a new life, away from Centipede, and away from SHIELD (they'd be staying in my place in Bethesda until we were sure Centipede had been dealt with, then they'd all have a new life).

Three days after the mess on that bridge I was sure Mindy, Kisha and Ace would be safe, then it was time to focus on getting Phil back. At first Fury had insisted that I let Phil's team, Hand and her own minions handle it; but three days had passed, and they were no closer to finding him than they'd been when that helicopter had flown off with him on. So I phoned Fury to warn him that I was going in (I wasn't asking permission, not when it came to my love, and he knew it).

Apparently I arrived just time. There was a confrontation taking place, and I didn't even need to see any of them to know it was Hand giving them trouble for the nth time.

"I know I'm not some bad-ass field agent like May or Ward, but this is what I do." The young hacker in the team was saying. "You can't just kick me off this mission. Listen, I will do whatever you say. All this protocol crap doesn't matter to me. All that matters to me is Coulson."

Just that was enough to make me like her already!

"Well, 'all this protocol crap' matters to me." Hand retorted in a rather condescending tone. "You're a distraction, and you're gone."

It looked like Agent Grant Ward was actually about to speak up, hopefully in Skye's favor; however, I chose to announce my presence instead and take over things myself.

"You should be careful what you say and in front of whom you say it, Agent Hand." I told her in my most blank tone (learnt from Phil). "Some might think you don't care about your colleagues."

Hand spun in my direction instantly, opened her mouth, and then froze. I could see the exact moment she recognized me (we'd already had our troubles in the past, mainly following the mess in London, when she'd wanted to take the Secret Circle and put them all in the Index, I hadn't allowed that... well, technically Loki and Nightingale hadn't allowed it, I just backed them up).

"Agent Lewis..." She muttered in obvious respect.

"I'm here to relieve you of your post." I announced simply.

"You cannot do that!" She snapped. "What authority have you to do that? None at all..."

"I have the authority as the Shadow of SHIELD." I cut her off. "You know what that means, now you can either leave now and take your minions, or we can call Director Fury and have him give you the exact same order."

For a moment it looked like she might fight me on it, however, Fury hadn't outright contradicted one of my initiatives to that point, and she knew it; which was probably why she finally gave up.

"I wonder what interest the Agent Shadow has in this matter..." She began, obviously angered.

"My interest is no business of yours, Agent Hand." I stated evenly. "You've already demonstrated your utter lack of concern for P... Agent Coulson's welfare, and your despicable lack of respect for his team. Since you obviously believe that it's more important to go after the people buying chitauri parts off the black market; who, might I add, have been around for the past three years and will quite probably continue to be for the next three, or more, instead of Agent Coulson, who is an important part of our organization. I'm relieving you of your responsibilities here. Now take your people and get off this craft!"

I didn't raise my voice at any moment, it wasn't necessary. Hand already knew the kind of power I possessed within SHIELD; and the fact that even outside it I had the backing of some very strong (politically, economically and socially) people; after all, how many could claim to be friends with gods, with a whole team of superheroes (or two), and to be publicly acknowledged as Tony Stark's daughter (nevermind the truth or lack thereof of that statement)? I'd given the orders, and there was nothing she could do to oppose them.

The moment all the minions finished rushing out of the plane I hit the button to close the ramp before spinning around to face the team, all of who were watching me with a bit of nervousness and excitement.

"Now, if this team is good and ready to find Phil..." I commented. "Lets get moving people!"

"Wheels up in five." May announced before turning and leaving for the cockpit.

"You're not going to send me away?" Skye blurted out nervously.

"Skye..." Ward began.

"Whyever would I do that?" I asked, honestly puzzled.

"Well, Hand didn't seem to like me, neither did any of the other Agents that invaded the Bus in the last few days, either." Skye answered with a shrug.

"You don't mind the minions." I deadpanned. "Few of them are capable of seeing a true treasure when it stands before them."

My very blasé comment startled a laugh out of the young woman, though it didn't really set her at ease; I was still an unknown.

"I know exactly who you are Skye." I assured her. "And I know that if anyone stands a chance of finding Phil soon, it's you... I hope you won't mind the help..."

"But this..." She gestured to her bracelet.

"I will override it for the time being." I informed her as we began walking to the command center. "I cannot take it off, only Phil can do that. But I can allow you to hack as much as is necessary until we find him and he takes care of that."

"You said you were a hacker too...?" Ward inquired, walking after us.

"Yes." I smirked. "TaserQueen, pleased to meet you..."

"Taser...?" Skye repeated, baffled. "You're the Taser?! You're the Queen of Hackers?!"

I just laughed. Her mere words confirming what I'd suspected, she was, indeed, the BlueCloud.

When Mike then stepped out of the car I'd arrived in (I'd told him to stay out of it until I'd dealt with Hand and her people, the less people who knew he was alive and alright the better for him and his family), the whole team went nuts. Skye especially broke into tears as she hugged him tightly; she'd been truly distressed after seeing him disappear behind the explosion.

They were all so happy to have him back, none of them thought to ask how exactly I'd managed to save his life; none except May...

"You've been in contact with Phil." She said the moment I sat beside her in the cockpit.

I didn't bother contradicting her, just raised a brow and waited for her to go on.

"We were the only ones who knew about what was happening on that bridge, we couldn't call HQ, and yet for Mr. Peterson to have survived that... someone else was there that night." May explained her reasoning. "You were there, you saved him. Phil contacted you, he'd a way of contacting that was off the radar."

"I'm a hacker." I clarified. "The Queen of the Hackers, like some tend to call me. I can get in touch with whoever I want and have it be off the radar."

"How long have you known Phil isn't dead?" May finally asked.

I pondered on the question for a bit. I could make something up, something believable, and it'd be alright (I knew better than outright lying to her). But I knew she was important to Phil, a dear friend. The two of them had been part of the same team, before each went their own way... she deserved to know the truth, at least to a point.

"I always knew he wasn't dead." I finally said. "Even before this team, before everything. I'm his contact, have always been. I'm his partner."

I only held back the last part of it, how I wasn't just his professional partner, I was also his wife... Phil could share that part with her if he wanted, once we got him back.

It took just a few hours for Skye to track down the right person, and then we were flying to the Nevada desert (after having sent some pertinent information to Hand so she could capture a few other people, like she preferred). We'd just arrived to the place when we heard the scream...

I wasn't even conscious of what I was doing, one moment I was standing at the end of the Bus's ramp, all nerves on end, the next I felt like I was trying to move through liquid, or shadows... and then I was standing inside a building, and there was the girl in the flower dress, and she had my husband hooked up to some freaky machine, and he was screaming...

I had her on the ground and was powering down the thing as fast as I could. I didn't even wait for all the freaky lights to go off, the moment I could I was bent beside him, holding both of his hands in mine, kissing his knuckles and whispering, giving him good things to focus on, so he might come back to me...

"Darce..." He breathed out as his eyes fluttered open.

"Hey..." I whispered back at him, eyes blurry and voice watery from tears. "Mo Anam Cara..."

"Mo Anam Cara..." He replied in turn.

It was something we'd gotten from Nightingale and Loki, using that phrase as a reassurance of who we were, on our own and to each other, of the strength of our bond... and then we kissed.

The team found us like that. I blushed at their presence, and could feel him tightening his hold on me, as if afraid that my embarrassment would make me let go... never. I'd never let him go. Never again, no matter what.

Nick wasn't exactly a fan of that decision; but I have a feeling that he'd known all along that it'd come one day (there were times when I could almost swear there was a hint of longing in Nick's eyes when he looked at the two of us, and I couldn't help but think that it wasn't exactly about us, perhaps someone else? Had Nick been married in the past? Had his wife died? Left him? Or had he left her? I had no idea, and wasn't sure I really wanted to know, something told me it wasn't a happy story...).

 **xXx**

I had some quite amazing times with that team, and some awful ones too. I loved seeing them interact; seeing such completely different individuals working together and achieving things that would have been absolutely impossible to any other such team in SHIELD, mostly because of the trust, or lack thereof. Of course, I knew what their first two missions had been like. Theirs was a team that had been forged in the 'heat of battle' as Thor would say, they'd had their 'make or break' moment, and that had made them strong.

The worst moment though, came when we stepped into that basement, in Quinn's villa in South Italy, and found Skye half dead beside the door, her blood painting a macabre image on the floor, showing how hard she'd fought to survive, and it was a battle she was losing...

Up until that point the only ones that knew, really knew, that I was a gifted were Phil and Mike (who'd insisted on staying with us until we were done with our mission, happy that his family was safe in my place, where no one but him, Phil and I even knew them to be). I'd never planned on telling the others, unsure how they might react... the moment I saw Skye half-dead I knew the time for holding back was past.

I'd only known I could somehow travel between shadows for a little over six months (since that day I'd saved Mike on the bridge), but I'd made sure to practice in secret whenever I got the chance. I could take no more than two people with me, and even that took great effort, yet I never doubted. I knew Phil was thinking the same thing I was...

"May," He called to his SIC. "Secure Quinn and this place up. We cannot count on the local authorities so you'll have to handle it."

"But sir, Skye..." Simmons began, obviously distressed.

"We're getting Skye to the Bus, join us as soon as you can." Phil added.

I didn't give them the chance to ask questions, to demand explanations, it was a time we didn't have, I placed a hand on Phil, who was already holding Skye tightly, then the other on her, and then called on my power and pulled us all into the shadows, ignoring the curses, gasps and wordless exclamations of those we left behind.

May really wasn't happy when she and the rest joined us, three hours later (she really had pushed everyone, for them to have gotten everything done so fast). Ward also gave us a look that made me think he might actually hit something (or someone). Things got better the moment they saw Skye sitting in the common area; she looked more than a bit drowsy and had a half-finished bottle of water in her hands (her third), but still, it was much better than she'd been.

"How...?" No one could quite believe what they were seeing.

"A gift from our Asgardian friends." Phil explained to them. "Some years ago Loki created vials filled with powdered healing stone, spelled so they would retain the properties, and could only be opened by specific people. Originally it was only his wife, but eventually that changed. That was what saved my life when I was stabbed, the day of the battle of New York (he didn't mention who exactly had stabbed him, it wasn't important in the grand scheme of things). After the debacle with the Berserker Staff, Nightingale left me a vial, to use in an emergency..."

No more needed to be said, it was obvious they all agreed with his call. In seconds FitzSimmons were all over Skye, embracing her (gingerly because they could see she was still tender; even though she'd been healed, she'd still lost a lot of blood and would need time to fully recover), Ward just stood in a corner, almost staring a hole right through her.

"There's nothing wrong with caring, you know?" I told him quietly. "It's true it can be hard, it can make you feel like you're weak... but beneath all that vulnerability, love will always make you stronger than anything else, it will be the force that allows you to go on when you think it's impossible, to go on when you think you can do no more, that will help you survive and achieve things you never imagined..."

He didn't say a word, but I wasn't expecting him too. I still wasn't at all surprised when, an hour later, I found him sitting on that same couch, Skye nestled against him, sleeping.

 **xXx**

Next we had a rather interesting meeting, with none other than Lady Helena, Goddess of Grief and Hope, Queen of Helheim... Nightingale's and Loki's firstborn daughter.

As it turned out a prisoner had escaped from the Asgardian prison: a spellweaver called Lorelei, the younger sister of the Enchantress Amora (a sorceress obsessed with Thor, and also the one responsible for the death of Tinúviel and her unborn child more than nine centuries prior). Amora was dead, had been since the day she'd killed Tinúviel, Lorelei had been imprisoned for the same amount of time, and somehow she'd managed to escape prison. Helena was sent after her because she was one of the strongest spellweavers in Asgard, and therefore more likely to be able to handle Lorelei. Also, Lorelei's special ability of sort-of hypnotizing men meant they couldn't send most warriors.

There were some difficulties, when Lorelei managed to take control of Ward. None of us knew how to deal with that. Until Skye went and planted herself before Ward, challenging him to go through her to do Lorelei's biding... he actually went as far as raising his gun and aiming it at the young hacker's chest. I was about to call on my powers to help, when Phil stopped me.

Then, as if some kind of switch had been flipped, Ward turned and shot at Lorelei instead. She was so shocked by the turn of events that she didn't even try to stop him, giving Hel the opening to subdue her. A second later Skye was in Ward's arms:

"You're an idiot!" He was berating her, even as he held her tight. "What if I'd killed you?!"

"I knew you wouldn't." She said, oddly calm for someone who'd just had a gun aimed at her. "I trusted you. I will always trust you Grant..."

None of us could have ever imagined how important that little statement would come to be...

 **xXx**

I didn't worry much when Tony (I called him dad sometimes, but mostly he was still Tony) dropped off the face of the earth abruptly. He'd called me already to tell me he and Pepper had decided to take a little vacation. A message that was followed a day later with an announcement that I had a little sister: Aylen Mariana Potts-Stark had just been born. While going through the dark web I picked up some rumors on a failed attempted assassination on the Starks, but didn't pay it much attention; it's not like there hadn't been others before, and they were alright, that was all that really mattered in the end.

I had no idea, back then, that that was but the beginning of the insanity coming our way...

Skye was finally made a SHIELD Agent, she was technically Level 1, but we all knew we would not be limiting the information she had access to, it was the same with everyone on the team. I was even toying with the idea of eventually suggesting to Nick that there could be more than one Shadow... still, there was no hurry, I expected we'd be busy enough for a while with our hunt of the Clairvoyant.

I'd already made a quick, encrypted call to the Institute, to make sure that the Professor was aware of all psychics among the mutant community, the Clarivoyant wasn't one of them. Destiny had suggested I 'widen my horizons', which meant that I wasn't completely scratching the possibility of him being truly clairvoyant; even if he wasn't a mutant there were many other gifted around the world.

The hunt gave results unexpectedly fast. We found Thomas Nash, a quadriplegic who'd been rejected from the Index as there had never been any proof of him having any actual gifts... what none of us could have planned for, was when Ward unexpectedly killed him in cold blood, while the man was 'talking' through a computer, threatening Skye... Ward claimed to have done it to protect the team, May insisted he'd done it just for Skye; I had the sinking suspicion there was more to it than even that...

Then, as if the day weren't bad enough already I got a coded message marked 'urgent' from Tasha: Nick Fury was dead, she and Steve were on the run and being hunted by SHIELD. I showed the message to Phil immediately. We really wanted to do something, but we still had to deal with Ward and his actions; there was just no time for us to take off; we also wanted to believe that it was all just a huge misunderstanding, one that would be solved soon... we had no idea that it was only going to get worse; though by the time I hung up my personal phone late that night, after a most shocking phone call with Natasha, some of it at least became quite clear.

"Darce...?" Phil called quietly, he could practically sense the tension in my body.

"I need everyone in the Communications room as soon as possible." I told him grimly.

"How bad is it?" He asked, probably already feeling the worst.

"Bad, and it's gonna get worse." I admitted darkly.

No one was asleep just yet, all stressed out by what had happened earlier. I even managed to convince Phil to let Ward out of containment for the time being. I began our impromptu meeting by showing the footage of the attack on Fury the day before; then, before the questions, shouting and whatever else could begin, I brought up a short memo, the official announcement of Nick Fury's death.

"That's impossible!" Ward blurted out, shocked. "If the Director were dead... we would know, wouldn't we?"

"Hard to tell." Phil admitted. "As far as most of SHIELD is concerned, we don't exist."

"I'm not sure he's really dead." I admitted softly. "It'd be just his style, to fake his death so he can go off-grid while everything else blows up."

"Just what else is blowing up?" Fitz asked, eyes wide in shock.

For all answer I pulled up the second video, the one about the car-chase through DC that had ended with a confrontation between Captain America, Black Widow, the Winter Soldier, a bunch of mercs, and a black-haired woman I had to do a double-take about.

"Who's that?" Skye was the first to ask the question. "She looks kind of familiar."

"She's Lady Sif, goddess of War, she hails from Asgard." I informed her, and the rest. "She's a friend of Thor's... I met her briefly in New Mexico five years ago." I made a pause before adding, more quietly. "Also... if my suspicions hold, I think she might also be the Valkyrie."

"The Valkyrie?" I wasn't surprised when almost no one seemed to know what I was talking about.

"The Captain's Shadow?" Phil asked, shocked.

Of course he'd know her by that name.

"Shadow?" Melinda eyed me speculatively.

"Her name was Sia Serrure back then, her older brother was Arianna Stark's husband." I gave them the short version of the story. "There are stories that paint her as either a gifted or another super-soldier. She was there with the Captain and the Howling Commandos through the war, and even went to work for the SSR for a while. History has buried her name so deeply most have forgotten she ever existed."

"But you know." Simmons pointed out.

"I've always liked history." I admitted with a shrug. "It was the second major I tried, and even when I switched to Political Sciences I kept it as a minor. It's always been a fascination of mine, the powerful women history has tried to either forget or erase..."

"Ok so, if you're right, she's powerful, is she on our side or...?" Ward began, only to break off at the sudden shudder of the Bus.

"What the hell is going on?!" Skye exclaimed, holding onto the holo-table for support.

"We're changing course." Melinda announced even as she ran to the cockpit, everyone else on her heels, she began flipping switches immediately, with no effect. "I've been overridden. Wherever we're going, there's nothing we can do to stop it."

"Don't give up so soon." I stated, switching on my tablet. "Skye, I'm gonna need your help."

"Yes." The younger hacker nodded immediately, rushing out to get her laptop and then returning.

"We're going to need to do some counter-hacking on whoever has taken over the plane." I told her, even as I set up my laser keyboard and began typing like crazy. "If we can find out who's doing this and why, good. But that's not our priority. We need to break their hold on this plane and make sure they'll never be able to take us over again."

"Got it." Skye nodded, her fingers flying over the keys just as fast.

"Could this be related to what you were telling us?" Simmons asked suddenly.

I actually stuttered, just for a fraction of a second, even as I gave her an answer.

"Probably." I admitted solemnly. "The short of it is, Hydra isn't as dead and gone as we thought it was. What's more, it's apparently been hiding in SHIELD for a while, possibly from the start. That's why Fury was attacked, why Steve and Tasha are being pursued; I even got a message from Clint, he barely made it out of Poland; the man he was supposed to be making contact with tried to kill him out of the blue."

"Is Clint alright?" Phil was evidently worried about him.

"For now." I nodded. "But it's hard to know where to go, who to trust, when you've just found out that Hydra has been infiltrating intelligence organizations and governments over the past fuck-knows-how-many years!"

And then, as if the whole situation weren't complicated enough already, there was suddenly a voice coming in through the comms:

"Do you read? Do you read, 6-1-6?"

The voice sounded somewhat familiar, perhaps one of the agents we'd been in touch with during the hunt for the Clairvoyant? I wasn't sure.

"Where's that coming from?" Fitz asked, looking around in confusion.

"Close." Simmons murmured, just as confused as he.

"Enemy aircraft on my tail. Over." The voice insisted.

"Garrett?" Phil called suddenly.

I made the connection then: John Garrett, an old friend of Phil's; he'd been there for the 'hunt', he was also one of those who'd signed in on Skye gaining 'agent status'.

"Coulson, I'm under attack." Garrett went on. "Drones. Repeat, S.H.I.E.L.D. drones are on my ass. We're not getting along. Do you copy?"

"Copy." My love finally said. "Garrett, what's happening? We've lost control of our aircraft."

"Hell if I know." Garrett admitted. "Tell me you got guns on that thing. I'm coming to you."

I vaguely heard Coulson talk to Fitz about re-wiring or re-routing or re-something the weapons on the Bus. Wasn't paying much attention, as Skye and I had finally gotten to the core of the signal hacking us.

Everything was so insane. When Skye had gone to Phil and I earlier, with her theory about Ward having killed the wrong Clairvoyant... I wasn't exactly surprised, a part of me had suspected something like that already, if for no other reason than the whole thing with Nash had been much too easy. The man had been consistently ahead of us for months, able to avoid all of our attempts, and coming close to killing us. And suddenly we caught him? Yeah, we had Mike on our side, and I was no slouch, nor was the rest of the team; but still.

Also, while I hadn't wanted to say anything, I couldn't help but think that there might be more behind Ward shooting Nash than just his desire to protect the team (or even just Skye, as seemed to be May's theory). Still, that was one thought I hadn't dared voice, (I barely even dare think about it) because if I was right, if I was right I feared it might split the team, our team apart...

Skye let out a wordless exclamation of triumph as we finally broke through the heavy firewalls surrounding the hacking signal. We all felt it, the moment the plane shuddered again as the signal pulling it lost power.

"Agent May, you'll have to take control." I informed her tersely. "I'm afraid that while Skye and I might have been able to wrench control back we've fully destroyed the auto-pilot in the process."

"That's alright." She assured me. "As long as we're the ones who decide where we go, it's all absolutely fine."

I was just getting my breath back (that had been some intense hacking!), when something else happened (because of course it would have too much to ask for things to go well and easy for once in our lives...).

"Sir..." Ward called suddenly, so serious I couldn't help but listen even as I kept an eye on the on the screen, as the source of the hack appeared. "Sir, you cannot let John on this plane."

"And why is that Agent Ward?" Phil asked, and I could hear the tension on his tone.

Suddenly I couldn't help but wonder, had he had the same thoughts as I?

For a moment Ward didn't say anything, he looked straight at Skye, then he nodded (seemingly to himself), took a deep breath and faced my husband again as he said:

"Because he's Hydra, sir. John Garrett is the Clairvoyant..."

* * *

So... you must have known from the start that some things had to be different. Remember what you saw in Fate and Destiny's finale, and in chapter 14 of Bouquet of Roses. We haven't gotten there yet, though by now you'll begin to see just how much things have changed. If you have any questions I'll be delighted to answer them.

Darcy... I decided almost from the start to make her a mutant, though it took me a while to choose her mutation. I mentioned it in several AUs, though the true potential of it has only been seen in one. I hope you like the twist I've given it.

Grant... to me it's quite logical why he's so different (same as Phil's different, and Darcy, from their cannon versions). Remember the talk he had with Nightingale in Nexus, and with Darcy here... this Grant isn't quite like the canon one, because he has influences in his life that weren't there in the original version. That's important, as you're beginning to see already. You'll see the rest next week.

Next chapter will be all about Skye, hope you'll enjoy it too. As always, full-sized poster and set of wallpapers can be found on DeviantArt, I go by Princess-Lalaith there. See ya!


	2. The Sword

I'm sorry! So very, very sorry! I totally and absolutely forgot about this until just now.

So, yeah, this is the second and final part of Sentinels, the episode is narrated by Skye and here you'll finish seeing how exactly the characters came to be where they are (were? will be?) in the previous chapters of "Fate and Destiny" and "Bouquet of Roses". There are references to events that happened in other chapters of previous fics too, and a little cameo from a character from a different fandom (which isn't really that important in the grand scheme of things, I just found her convenient)... and you'll finally see why this fic is called "Sentinels" exactly.

NEXT WEEK is BACK TO BOUQUET OF ROSES

* * *

 **The Sword (Skye)**

I had an English professor in high-school who told us that there's only one basic plot in all of literature; beyond the heroes and villains and all the clichés: 'Who am I?' I didn't like the teacher much, but I know she was right about that part, at least when it came to me.

For as long as I can remember my greatest wish has been to find myself, to learn where I come from, who my parents are and, most importantly: why did they leave me alone?

My oldest memory is of arriving back to St. Agnes after being returned by yet another family (I later learned they were the 10th family to take me in for a while, only to send me back after a few months), I was four years old at the time... That process was to be repeated, time and again, for more than a decade more.

Someone left me on St. Agnes's doorstep when I was but a baby (4 to 10 months old, the doctor in the orphanage declared me to be), no papers, no birth-certificate, nothing but a nappy, an old tank top that had been put on me to serve as a dress, and a double necklace with two small plaques and a round pendant. I kept the necklace, never took it off. I knew the symbols on the plaques were Chinese, but wasn't able to find anyone who could translate it, the best they were able to tell me was that they were an old form of Chinese that has been out of use for over a century. The round pendant was easier, it was a mantra pendant. The symbol was the 'OM', the sound of the universe, the first original vibration; which represented the birth, death and rebirth process. According to what I found on the internet and a few books, chanting that sound was supposed to bring us into harmonic resonance with the universe... I wasn't sure I believed that. One thing I did know, though, the necklace gave me a sense of belonging like nothing else did; it was mine and mine alone. All I had that truly and absolutely belonged to me.

Through the years I had different kinds of foster-families. There were those who only wanted me because of the money the government gave them for keeping kids like me around, so they didn't really much care what I did most of the time. There were those who believed they were god's gift to mankind and it was their mission to raise as many kids as they could and guide them down the 'right path'; now, that could go one of two ways, either they were so completely invested in each and every one of their children that every minor mistake was crushing to everyone, or they were so obsessed with things being a certain way they wouldn't leave us alone... in any case, it never went right. There were those who'd always wanted children but couldn't have them, so they then decided to become foster-parents, that could go very right, or very wrong (especially when by some kind of miracle they suddenly got a child of their own... There were a couple of times, with parents like that, when I was still young and was sent back I really wished I could have stayed). Of course there were also the really bad ones, the drug addicts and the drunks and the violent ones; I learned early on how to survive their kind...

Only one time did I have someone else to fight for me, to protect me. Her name was Lorna, she was my foster sister when I was five years old, she was ten years older than me. That time it was just the two of us, no other siblings and our foster-parents were a addicted to cocaine and very violent. They were also the kind to keep up a facade before others, which was hard when Lorna refused to let them dye her hair (it was green).

At first I too had thought it was odd, perhaps some form of rebellion on her part, until she told me the truth, how her hair had changed all on its own, from its original pale blonde to the vibrant green she had in that moment. She hated using dye, because why should she have to hide a part of herself? It wasn't like she was ashamed of it, or of any part of herself. I learned that from her, to be proud of who and what I am, to let no one make me feel less... it wasn't easy, especially once she was gone, but I tried.

It had been at least in part my fault. I was learning to read and one of my teachers, one of the nice ones, had lent me a book so I could practice at home. Lorna helped me when she could, and we always made sure to hide the book whenever our 'parents' were around. But that day we forgot. They (mostly he) went nuts, began ranting about us being rats, being thieves, so sure we must have stolen their money to buy a 'useless piece of paper', they destroyed it. No matter how much I screamed at them not to. It was then that she got involved, yelling at me to shut up, and when I wouldn't, she smacked me hard enough to throw me to the ground. And then Lorna... she just seemed to snap.

It would be hard to tell if, in the years that have passed since, I've forgotten the exact events that followed, or if I was never truly aware, being so young and all. What I do know is that, at the end of it the house had burnt down, our foster parents' bodies were eventually found in the wreckage, too drugged out to even find their way out in time. Lorna got me out, before taking off. I remember her apologizing for not being able to take me with her, but we both knew it was going to be hard enough for her to survive, being barely fifteen, we'd have never made it together.

For many years later I kept praying that she'd made a new life for herself, a good life, hoping that one day we might meet again, that we might both be happy...

 **xXx**

I was still trying to recover from the trauma of losing the first person I'd come to truly care for, telling myself I wouldn't get that close to someone again... and then she came. She fit in none of the categories for foster families I'd created in my mind, she was absolutely amazing, the closest to perfect I'd ever seen, except for one thing: she wasn't mine...

I was eight years old, had been with a new family for a few weeks, living in Las Cruces, NM. From the very start I'd realized that Mrs. Jones was a recovering addict way too obsessed with religion, while Mr. Jones was a drunk, and a violent one. I had a foster-sister: Helen, and a foster-brother: Ryan Jones (he was a biological son of the couple). Usually with such families I'd do my best to stay out of the way; but Helen was only 3, and had no way of doing the same, so I did my best to protect her. It cost me more cuts and bruises than I probably would have had otherwise, but in turn she was unharmed... I counted that as a win. In any case, that was pretty much how I ended in that hospital's ER with a dislocated shoulder at the end of January in 2001...

The nurse was surprised when I told her my age, apparently they had me pegged to be six or seven. I did not tell that the only 'happy birthday' I'd gotten was the one I'd told myself the previous month; and it's not like I could be sure my birthday was then. My admittance paper in St. Agnes had me as having been born anywhere between June and December of 1992 and the nuns had chosen the latter as more likely for whatever the reason. So, for all I knew I might have been closer to nine than eight by that point... which, I realized, probably wouldn't have made things any better as that point, judging by the 'malnourished' comment one of the doctors had scribbled down on my records.

Truth be told I wasn't expecting much to come of it all. It's not like it was the first time I ended in the hospital, or with a social worker... far as I was concerned all it meant was that I'd probably end back in St. Agnes sooner than usual, only to be shipped back out as soon as possible. I really did not see the point anymore (a grim outlook on life for a little-girl, more than one person told me through the years). And then there she came.

She was the nurse on duty when I got to the hospital. From what I later heard, she was also the one to pick up on the signs of abuse first. Then, when Ryan told the Social Worker everything, and Helen got a new family, and I was told St. Agnes was full and they couldn't take me, she stepped in. Her name was Rosalie Nova, she was young, barely 20 years old, taking a couple of classes to finish her degree, while at the same time doing her internship.

When I first moved in with her I didn't expect much. Even though she moved out of her previous apartment and into a new one so I would have my own room, and she insisted on taking me to a number of stores and buy me a new wardrobe and even a few toys (though even back then I was more interested in books than dolls). I followed her example and mostly dressed in denim, plaid and boots. It was like a sort of defense mechanism for me, doing all I could to fit in with whatever family I'd been placed; sometimes it made things easier, others not so much. Rosalie didn't comment on it, she just insisted it was my choice, and left it at that.

It took a while, but the more time that passed I couldn't help but feel more and more comfortable around her, in the apartment (our apartment), my school; I even visited her at her job sometimes. I couldn't go anywhere, but the nurses allowed me to wait for her in their private lounge. I also began calling her Sally, because everyone else did too.

She was beautiful: of average height, slim figure, lightly tanned skin, raven-black slightly wavy hair to the middle of her back and warm chocolate brown eyes that seemed to almost glow at times. There were some times when I wondered if she was angel, sent just for me...

After three months 'in probation' Miss Matthews, the social worker arrived carrying what looked to me like a mountain of paperwork. After signing on all of it Sally packed bags for both of us and told me we were going on a little trip. We didn't go exactly far, no more than two hours by car (though we took some turns that made me sure that the place was next to impossible to find if you didn't know where you were going). The place turned out to be a ranch. Her ranch, right there smack in the middle-of-nowhere, and there were so many flowers... it seemed impossible, almost like magic (yet another point to the angel-theory... or maybe she was a fairy?).

She taught me all about caring for flowers that weekend. All things her sister Willow had taught her. Even told me a few things about her; regretfully Willow was dead, so I'd never get to meet her. But there was hope of one day meeting her children: Django and Nina.

I knew by that point that Sally wasn't a normal person. Beyond any childish dreams of mine, I was quite sure she had to be older than she looked, than her papers said she was... I was also quite sure I hadn't imagined the way her eyes would somehow glow and change colors. Rosalie Nova had a great secret, and I could only hope to be trustworthy enough to learn it one day. In any case, I was sure that whatever it might be, she'd never stop being my personal angel...

One thing I would never forget, was what she told me at the end of that weekend, before we went back to Las Cruces and our normal lives:

"I brought you here, because this is my home." She explained softly. "And above anything else I want you to know that you will always have a home right here, with me. For as long as you want it, and me. I will be your family, and this place will be your home as much as mine, do you understand what I'm saying?"

I nodded, unable to get a single word out. She was offering me everything I'd always wanted, and the mere thought made me want to cry so hard I could only keep myself in check by not saying a word at all...

Of course, because life's a bitch, I couldn't get my happy ending. At the end of July I found out that the hospital was having money problems, Sally was gonna lose her job. I spent two days terrified nearly out of mind. Sure that was it, she was going to send me away... only, when she finally went to me, it was to explain that We couldn't stay in Las Cruces anymore. We...

It was amazing, making plans. Sally insisted on my opinion being important, and I really wanted to go to California, because Hollywood, and LA, and the movies made it seem like California was an awesome place... It might have been a bit foolish, but Sally still approved the plan. So next we began seeing into some place to live. The final decision wouldn't be made until we got there and actually saw the places, but we had some idea.

The day we tentatively finalized our plans was the first time I called her Mom, instead of Sally... I'd never done that before, not for any other foster-mother.

And then Miss Matthews appeared... They said that Sally was too young, unmarried, without a job, they said she wasn't the right kind of person to raise a child. I cried and screamed, threw a tantrum like I never had... I wanted to make them understand that they were making a mistake. Sally was the best person ever, it didn't matter if she was young, or didn't have a husband, and she didn't really need a job. She was awesome, and she wanted me... and she was my mom!

They went to pick me up soon enough, but I didn't want to go, I really, really didn't, and for the first time in my life I wasn't afraid to let people know how I was feeling:

It took a while but Mom eventually calmed me down. A part of me wanted to continue my tirade, but by then I'd realized it wasn't helping; and the last thing I wanted was to make them think that Mom hadn't taught me to be a good girl. So I did my best.

"Now." She said then. "You have to go with Miss Matthews, who will take you to another place. Where you'll have another family who will love you..."

"They won't love me as much as you do..." I couldn't help but mutter, almost petulantly.

"Maybe they will, maybe they won't." She whispered back to me. "But you know what? That doesn't change the fact that I love you, I will always love you. And you can do the same. Getting a new family doesn't mean you have to lose the old one. You remember I told you that?"

"Yes..." I did remember. "Like you love your Mama, and your Papa, and your Tate (Pops), and everyone else..."

"Exactly." She agreed. "You can have more than two parents, you can have as many as you want, and you can love them all. The heart is a wonderful thing, darling. The more people you love, the more love you have for all of them. It never runs out..."

"But I wanna be with you..." I whined, as quietly as I could.

"I know you do, and I do too, but this we cannot change. Perhaps one day things might be different, but for now you need to be a big girl and go with Miss Matthews."

I didn't want to, I really didn't, but I could see the tears beginning to gather in the corners of her eyes. She was sad, and I didn't want her to be sad, so I decided it was time to be a big girl, to be brave, like she taught me.

"You will remember me, right?" I asked, unable to fully hide the insecurity I was feeling.

I hated it, not only because it reminded me of the frightened little girl I'd been before meeting her, but also because I didn't want her to think it was her fault in any way. No, I knew she wanted me, she loved me... and yet I still needed the reassurance in that moment.

"Forever and ever." She assured me. "Whatever may happen, I will always remember you."

"I will remember you too." I told her in turn.

"I know you will." She nodded. "And I want you to remember something else. Whatever might happen, know that you will always have a home, okay? My home will always be yours too. And if you ever need me, I will always be there for you. No matter what happens, of how much time passes. You're my family Mary, and you always will be. Okay?"

"Okay." I nodded.

Mary... Mary Sue Poots, that was the name the nuns at St. Agnes had given me when they took me in, it was who I'd been my whole life. I realized right then it wasn't who I wanted to be, not anymore. Even if I wasn't able to do anything about it right then, one day I'd change my name, and I knew already what I wanted my new one to be...

"Skye..." I told her softly. "That will be my name one day. Skye Nova..."

"It's a beautiful name." She assured me, voice watery with tears. "I love you, my Skye..."

"I love you Mom..." I kissed both her cheeks quickly.

She went to kiss both my cheeks and I could hear her whispering quietly in another language, some sort of prayer. It saddened me realizing I wouldn't get the chance to ask her what she was saying exactly, but I didn't comment on it. And then an idea got into my head and I began tugging at my necklace. I had never taken it off, it was mine... and yet I wanted to give her something to remember me by, something that might connect us; she stopped me before I could take it off.

"But I want you to have it..." I tried to explain.

"I know, I know you do. But I want you to keep it." She told me softly, kindly. "I promise I don't need a necklace to remember you by. You will always be in my mind."

"Okay." I nodded.

I believed her. If she said she'd remember me, then she would. And I'd do my best to never forget her either. When it was time to leave I refused to take Miss Matthew's hand, as a final act of defiance it probably wasn't much, but it was important to me. I also pilfered one of Mom's plaid button ups, a dark blue one, and pulled it on above my favorite clothes; outside it was hot, almost sweltering, but I didn't care, the shirt smelled like her, like the mix of flowers and the desert air in the ranch. I knew it wouldn't last, but I'd enjoy it for as long as it did.

Days later I found something at the bottom of my bag. It was a plastic ring, it went three times around my finger and was white. I remembered it had been the surprise inside a chocolate egg mom had bought me during our shopping trip our first week together. The ring was too big for me to wear in any finger but my thumb, but I didn't care. It wasn't a big thing, but it was still a reminder that it was real, that mom existed, and she wanted me... I promised myself that one day, somehow, I'd find my way to her again.

I tried my best to do as mom had asked and give people a chance. I never again found someone I truly loved, though, or some who loved me, who wanted me. Never called anyone else mom... a part of me couldn't help but feel it was only right. Who could ever compare with my mom? I wasn't sure even my birth-mother (if I ever found her) could.

Mattie, the only other friend I'd ever had at St. Agnes, left the orphanage when he turned 18 in 03. He had big plans, getting his GED, getting a job that would eventually pay for college, he wanted to be a lawyer, help make the world a better place... I honestly believed he'd do it. Most people saw him as less because he was blind, even the nuns would pity him sometimes, but I knew that blindness would never be enough to stop Mattie, there was something about him, I could almost feel it. I wondered if it had been like Lorna's magic, the one she'd used to get us out of that house before we burned with it and our foster-parents...

He also offered to help me out once I got out of the system too. I thanked him but made no promises, something I'm sure he noticed. I knew he had some grand plans, he was a good guy, wanted to make the world a better place; I didn't much care about the world in general, all I cared about was getting answers to all my questions: Who were my parents? Where did I come from? Who was I really?

 **xXx**

I left St. Agnes for the final time on December of 2010, the day after what was supposed to be my 18th birthday. One of the nuns had offered to allow me to stay past Christmas, but I knew she was only doing that because she felt bad about leaving me on my own when it was a month to think about Jesuschrist and all that... It didn't make much difference to me. Regardless of everything the nuns had tried to teach me (teach us all) cannot say I believed in much of anything back then.

I went to Boston, it was the closest city and I didn't know what else to do. In January I got my GED and began looking for a job. Tried my hand at being a waitress, but it didn't take; I had no patience for all the creepy bastards calling me 'sweetheart' and trying to feel me up, and if I snapped at them I got no tips, so it was a lose-lose deal.

In April I met Emma. She was a bail bonds woman (I liked to call her a bounty hunter, and we both would laugh at the wild west allusions). She was the first person I met who didn't seem to think that me being barely eighteen, an orphan and with barely a diploma and very little formal education (I never went to good schools, and even my GED I only managed to earn it with a lot of self-study) made me less somehow. Eventually I learned that was because she was, or at least had been like me, an orphan, one who was never adopted. She ran away from her group home eventually and lived on the streets, stealing to survive, until she was caught and sent to juvie. After getting out she'd tried to do better and an old man had given her a chance, trained her as a bail bonds person; he'd just retired the year before, leaving her the business.

It didn't take long for Emma to learn I was good at computers, and kept getting better. So she hired me as a sort-of assistant. She even recommended me for the apartment being subleased a floor below hers. It was a bit pricy, but with her help I could handle it. I thought it was the start of a whole new life... I was wrong.

Six months later, after finishing yet another job, Emma disappeared without a warning. At first I didn't think much of it. It was her birthday, and I knew the day was hard for her. She'd told me once how she'd been abandoned by the side of the road. I was shocked, at least I'd been delivered to St. Agnes, but to leave a newborn baby out in a highway in the middle of the night?! I honestly couldn't understand it. I'd offered her to try and find something about her parents, and even when she claimed not to be interested, I tried anyway (I'm sure she knew). I never found anything more than a few columns in a newspaper, detailing how she'd been found, and the brave little boy who'd found her... apparently an orphan himself.

Two weeks after disappearing on me Emma finally got in touch. So apparently she had a son, one she'd given up on the very same day he was born. He'd tracked her down and after taking him back to his adopted mother she'd decided to stick around for a while, the boy was obviously in serious need of attention, and Emma had a feeling something was off with his adopted mother (and the whole town really). So she'd decided to stay.

I, of course, took the emergency extra key she'd given me and packed up all her things, sent them to the address she gave me, in Storybrooke, Maine. I considered going there myself, but in the end decided not to. Emma had a son she needed to look after, she had no need for a clingy teen-aged girl. Still, I couldn't help but feel abandoned, there was no way I could hold down the business without Emma, which meant I was out of a job, and a place to live too (there was no way I could pay the rent for that apartment on my own without that job).

Even with the way things ended with her, and with Boston, I will never regret knowing Emma for those six months. While finding out that someone could abandon their child just like that lessened my hopes of one discovering that my parents did love me and had never wanted to let me go, that it was all some kind of mistake... and yet, Emma did love her son (Henry, I thought his name was) and she was proving it, so maybe even that possibility wouldn't be so bad. Still, it was that situation which finally made me decide something: I was going to find my birth-parents. No matter what I had to do, I would do it.

And so began my journey.

 **xXx**

I met Miles several months after my lease on the Boston apartment ended. I'd spent that time mostly traveling from one place to another, looking for one that I might like, taking odd jobs to stay afloat. Eventually I ended in Austin, Texas. I found myself naked in bed, his bed, the next morning. It wasn't planned, I most likely had too much to drink, but he kept buying me shots and it felt like I was finally letting out all the stress I'd been accumulating for months. It's not like I thought he'd forced himself on me, but still, it wasn't what I'd have preferred.

I don't know when or how exactly we went from a 'one night stand' to being boyfriend and girlfriend. The first time he saw me behind a computer he realized I knew how to hack, though most of the things I did were simple. He taught me a lot more tricks, most of them dirty, the kind that one used when stealing information, most of the time to either sell it to the highest bidder, or some kind of scam. I didn't like it. When I decided to become a hacker it might not have been with the best intentions, but still, being a con-artist, a spy, a thief... those weren't my goals.

I tried to explain such things to Miles, and while for a time I liked to think I'd succeeded, I learnt the truth eventually...

It was Miles who introduced me to the Rising Tide. Of course, when he did he didn't imagine how fast I'd pick up on all his tricks, how little time it'd take me to improve on some of them. In a relatively short time I was above him in the organization (though calling the 'Rising Tide' such probably wouldn't be right, it's not like I was getting paid, or any of the other benefits of a formal job). Miles claimed he didn't mind, of course, but kept bringing it up, until a moment came when I grew tired of it. So I packed my bags and left.

When I left Texas I wasn't exactly planning on going to California. The mere thought of that state brought up memories of mom, of all the plans we'd made... I knew by then how childish the idea of going to live there because of Hollywood and because movies made the place look pretty, actually was. I also knew it was probably a good place, but the idea of going there without mom. It just didn't seem right... I still ended in LA months later... somehow.

It wasn't that bad. I did some odd jobs here and there. I knew how to fix most cellphones and laptops quickly and people paid me well for it. Also, I'd created a program that could find every piece of a person's information in the net and delete it; allowing for another identity to be created. I called it 'Clean Slate' and sold it to a confidential buyer; they made me sign about a dozen forms or so to make sure I would never reveal I was the creator of the program, I was also forbidden from replicating it, though I was allowed to keep the original version of it for personal use. I never did find out who exactly had bought it though, when I looked the names that had been given, all I could find were shell corporations.

I used the program myself once, to erase Mary Sue Poots. I wasn't that girl, had never been that girl, and most of the years I'd been forced to use the name were better off forgotten, as far as I was concerned. Of course, there were a few exceptions, where it came to mom, to Lorna and even Mattie and Emma... but I doubted I'd ever see any of them again. Also, I remembered what I'd once told mom, of what my name would one day be. I used the name Skye, but didn't use the surname, it didn't feel right, when she wasn't there to give it to me. And I liked being just Skye, just a girl, with no origins, no past and the world at her feet.

Apartments were even pricier in LA than they'd been in Boston, and by that point I'd already spent a serious amount of my money in a second-hand van (on the outside it looked a bit old and banged-up, but in the inside it was very well maintained; which was perfect for me, as it worked fine but looked just bad enough to make it less likely for others to attempt to steal it from me) and a lot of good equipment for my hacking; I also kept about half of it in a secret account, in case of an emergency. I didn't much mind living in a motel, but it turned out to not be a good idea. There was no security, and after two attempted muggings and one near-rape I gave up on that. Instead I began living in the back of my van, always making sure to park in relatively safe neighborhoods (but not with so much security that some kind of guard would send me away for loitering or something). And that was pretty much my life for two years, until the day I met them: Agents Phil Coulson and Grant Ward of SHIELD...

When I first got into SHIELD my intentions were completely personal, and selfish. I intended to take advantage of the opportunity and hack the hell out of them until I got the information I was looking for. It was a gift Miles had given me before leaving Texas: my admittance papers into St. Agnes. On their own they weren't much use, seeing how more than half of their contents was completely blacked out; but I was able to discover who had done that: SHIELD.

I actually tried to get into SHIELD legally. I thought I could be an asset to them, probably on the field, most likely in Communications. And perhaps after a few years I'd gain their trust, earn a clearance level that allowed me to see the un-redacted version of that document. It was pointless. I had little formal education, no degree and no military history, even my ability as a hacker was questioned since they had no records about me (didn't they stop to consider that if I were really good then I could make sure they didn't know I existed?); then, as if that weren't enough, I didn't actually have a legal birth-certificate. So I was rejected.

It had been after that that I'd used Clean Slate to erase Mary Sue Poots completely, keeping a single copy of everything that had once made me her in a single SD card, which I never let out of my sight. Those papers were effectively the only legal proof that I'd ever existed at all. (Even when I took the name Skye I hadn't created a paper trail, hadn't made it a legal identity, I didn't see the point).

I never intended to care. Not about SHIELD as a whole, and especially not about the team. But how could I not? Simmons was so infinitely kind, sweet, and innocent, made me want to protect her, like Lorna had protected me once; Fitz was so quiet, so gentle, yet I knew that he was strong, so strong, and one day the world as a whole would know it, he was the brother I always wished Mattie would be; also, they were so completely in love with each other, and neither of them realized it. May was strong, very much so, cold in the exterior and she could be cruel, so very cruel... yet I knew she cared, so much, about all of us; I could only wonder what had happened to her, to make her feel like she couldn't show it. I didn't dare ask. AC (short for Agent Coulson, because Coulson was too formal and he didn't want me calling him Phil... and because he was cool) was... everything. He was everything I'd always dreamed my father would be, and everything I could have never thought of. If Sally was the only woman I'd ever see as my mom, AC was the only man I could ever see as my dad. And that was where the real trouble began, because if I saw FitzSimmons as siblings, May as an aunt/sister and AC as my dad that meant I cared about them, a lot, and how could I ever turn my back on people I cared for?

Grant Ward... he was a whole other trouble. He was hot, of course I noticed that from the first time I laid eyes on him (I'm not blind!). He seemed to understand me, in a way no one else had before, and not only because of his own past with his abusive family (he might not have said it with those exact words, but even without being an agent I could read between the lines). He knew just enough of my past to have an idea of the rest and he didn't pity me or see me as less because of it. He knew I was strong and clever, and just waiting for the right time to prove it.

I sometimes felt like there was something calling me to him. When he began training me to be an agent I was so excited, even when I was so exhausted I could barely breathe and had no idea how exactly I was supposed to get off the mats... even the smallest sign of approval from him was enough to make me smile wide. And I didn't know why! It wasn't like I needed his approval, I hadn't needed anyone's approval in a very long time. And yet I loved having it (maybe I did know why, I just didn't want to accept it).

Then, of course, something had to go wrong. Miles came back into my life and into SHIELD's radar in the most unexpected way. He was giving out other people's secret, selling them to the best bidder! A man died because of him! And because I wanted to believe that he wasn't as bad as SHIELD made him look, that there was still some of the Miles I knew (or thought I knew) in him. So maybe Chan's dead was on me too. The worst part? Not only a man died and I turned out to be wrong about Miles, but what trust I'd earned with the team was gone.

I actually considered running away, I really did. The bracelet on my wrist... I knew I could find a way to take it off; or if not that, I could probably find someone to do it for me. I didn't even care about finding my parents right then; not when the looks everyone in the team kept giving me felt harsher than all the blows I'd received from bullies and abusive foster-parents put together. And AC's expression of disappointment... it was almost more than I could take. I wasn't sure that even finding my birth-parents was worth enduring that.

And yet I couldn't imagine leaving. The mere thought of it pained me. I had been powerless to keep my mom with me when I was eight; but I wasn't a child anymore, and I still saw AC as a dad; if I ran away, I'd be the one giving him up then. I couldn't do that.

So I endured the looks, the heavy silences, the disapproval and tried time and again to prove that I wanted to belong with them. That I wanted to be part of the team... of the family.

When we landed at the Hub a voice in the back of my head kept whispering that it was my opportunity. The place was big enough I would probably be able to find the file I wanted there, and probably more. AC had promised to help, and he had, some, but I was so sure I could do better if I had even five minutes in their databases. Even the bracelet they'd put on me wouldn't have been enough to stop me if I'd really wanted to do it.

And then Ward and Fitz were sent on a mission, and none of us were told anything about it. Even AC and May hardly knew anything. That wasn't right! And then when I happened to find out just a bit more, what I learned was enough to make me decide that as awesome as my team might be, SHIELD was just like any other creepy intelligence organization in the world. The kind that thought their word should be law, that believed they knew better than anyone else, and that were ready to sacrifice innocent lives to achieve their objectives... well, I wasn't about to allow that! Thankfully May and Simmons took my side, and eventually so did AC. It was probably that day which redefined us all, we were no more a team, nothing so simple and changeable as that; we were a family.

When AC was kidnapped I almost went nuts. I spent almost 24 hours straight typing like crazy, and whenever I got close to.. something, the bracelet would block me (it was until later that it occurred to me it might not be an accident, that someone was trying to protect the very people I was pursuing).

I could have taken off the bracelet, or at the very least disabled it. I could have... but I didn't. I knew that if I did that, when they found out, the team would never trust me again. Even if I did it for a good reason. Then Hand wanted to throw me out, and right when I feared it really was the end... she appeared. She: Darcy Lewis, Agent Shadow... she had no official rank in SHIELD, no official clearance level, and yet she had power, probably as great as AC's, I immediately thought she was awesome. Of course I wasn't surprised at all when we finally rescued AC and the two of them turned out to be husband and wife. Really, as awesome as each of them were they truly deserved each other. Also, I had to admit that seeing the two of them gave me hope, hope that one day I might find such a love...

Getting shot was not nice. It was probably the worst thing I'd ever been through. Yet, the moment I will never forget, and which will probably give me nightmares for years wasn't actually being shot, not even when Quinn laid me on the floor with his ridiculous platitudes (something about orders, I think, the searing pain made it hard to pay attention); or when I managed to focus enough to move, to try like hell to ignore the pain and fight for my life, dragging myself across half the room, to the door, painting the floor with my blood... No, the truly worst moment was when I was sitting there, beside the open door, and instead of a shout all that came out of my mouth was a breathless whisper; when I realized that regardless of how hard I tried to fight, I had already lost... I was as good as dead.

It was a miracle (or rather a series of miracles) that I survived. First with the rest of the team finding me just in time, Darcy being able to get me back to the Bus, and AC having been gifted that vial of Asgardian healing powder... I still had to drink a lot of water and was kept on near-forced bed-rest for a week, and very light duty for the rest of the month. But I survived! That was good enough for me.

Also, a freaking superhero saved my life! How awesome is that?

Meeting Lady Helena was almost awe inspiring. And yet... we had met both her parents by that point, during the whole Berserker-Staff-mess (and I still had trouble believing I'd met and talked to Loki, he'd always been my favorite of all the Nordic Gods); Darcy called both of them her friends, and we could see they held her in the same regard. Also, we were forced to deal with a psycho witch called Lorelei who loved using her voodoo on men to force them to do her biding (not cool!). It's not that Lady Helena was less, not at all, but there was something about her... like she seemed more human than any of the others in her family we'd just met.

I actually told her that, pretty much blurted it out, at some point. She just laughed, a musical laugh that made me feel almost warm inside.

"I'm no human at all, Skye." She told me kindly. "And I'm sure you're well aware of that. Most of it I'll admit has to do with the glamour, the one I use to conceal the scars on half of my body."

"Scars?" I couldn't help but ask. "Like in the myth?"

"Probably as terrible as they're described in your mythology, but the origins are nothing like you might be able to picture just reading your books." She announced. "I wasn't born with those scars, and while you could certainly say they were caused by a curse, it wasn't for anything I ever did wrong. I got my scars attempting to save my mother from Amora. They were caused by the same power that killed her and my unborn sister. I only survived because Ada (Dad) got me to Helheim, where time passes differently and they got the chance to save me. An opportunity that Nana never got."

"Oh..." I didn't say anything more, I didn't have words.

"I'm not ashamed of my scars." She went on. "They're proof of what I've survived, of how hard I've fought, and of the power I have... however, I prefer to use a glamour, as it helps others be more at ease when around me. It may also be that which makes me seem more human to your eyes. Ada has been known to do it too, though not often..." Her voice turned conspiratorial as she added. "I think he actually likes having all that attention. And Nana... well, there is a reason why they are called Light-elves... possibly the purest creatures in the universe. There are even those who believe the first elves must have been angels... or at least the closest there is to such; beings of untouched light..."

 **xXx**

The day I was officially made an Agent of SHIELD was probably one of the happiest of my life. It was quickly followed by a whole lot of tension as I was instructed to plan the mission that would, hopefully, allow us to capture the Clairvoyant. Three teams would be sent out and only I would know who they were, where they were going and who they were going to get. It was a whole lot of responsibility. A part of me didn't quite understand why Darcy wasn't the one doing it, aside from the fact that she wanted to be part of one of the teams.

It also didn't help when Agent Blake ended in the hospital with some serious injuries, Mike himself was injured so bad I suspected he would have either died or been permanently maimed if it weren't for the Centipede serum; the others too were injured, though less so. The mission was fulfilled though, we got Thomas Nash, our Clairvoyant... whom Grant proceeded to shoot dead while the man was busy using his creepy mechanic voice to give a whole speech about what would happen to the team, to me...

May was furious, AC and Darcy wanted explanations, and I was having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that Grant, my SO, my friend, my... that he'd just killed a man in cold blood, because of me. Even Mike telling me I couldn't see it like that wasn't enough.

It only got worse when, as I was looking over the files I'd downloaded to my laptop in other to fix the operation (I was too wired up to even try to sleep) I realized something. What if Thomas Nash wasn't the Clairvoyant? Of course I immediately went with that to AC and Darcy. They both reached the same conclusion I had: The Clairvoyant didn't have a cognitive gift, he had security clearance... which meant he was an Agent of SHIELD; and most likely a high ranked one.

It hadn't been more than half an hour since I'd left them to ponder on what to do next, I was trying very hard not to think what those discoveries were likely to mean for Grant; when we were suddenly called to the Situation Room. Even Ward had been let out of the Containment Room so he could be present as the news were delivered (a video and several files as proof to back it up); suffice it to say we were all so shocked neither of us had the slightest idea how to react until:

"That's impossible!" Ward blurted out, shocked. "If the Director were dead... we would know, wouldn't we?"

"Hard to tell." AC admitted. "As far as most of SHIELD is concerned, we don't exist."

"I'm not sure he's really dead." Darcy admitted quietly. "It'd be just his style, to fake his death so he can go off-grid while everything else blows up."

"Just what else is blowing up?" Fitz asked, eyes wide in shock.

For all answer a second video appeared on the screen, it showed a car-chase through DC that had ended with a confrontation between Captain America, Black Widow, the Winter Soldier, a bunch of mercs, and a black-haired woman that called my attention immediately.

"Who's that?" I asked straight out. "She looks kind of familiar."

"She's Lady Sif, goddess of War, she hails from Asgard." Darcy informed us. "She's a friend of Thor's... I met her briefly in New Mexico five years ago." She made a pause before adding, more quietly. "Also... if my suspicions hold, I think she might also be the Valkyrie."

"The Valkyrie?" Only one person seemed to know what she was talking about:

"The Captain's Shadow?" Of course it was AC.

"Shadow?" Melinda eyed Darcy speculatively, probably thinking about her code-name.

"Her name was Sia Serrure back then, her older brother was Arianna Stark's husband." Darcy gave us what was probably the short version of the story. "There are stories that paint her as either a gifted or another super-soldier. She was there with the Captain and the Howling Commandos through the war, and even went to work for the SSR for a while. History has buried her name so deeply most have forgotten she ever existed."

"But you know." Simmons pointed out.

"I've always liked history." The 'Shadow' admitted with a shrug. "It was the second major I tried, and even when I switched to Political Sciences I kept it as a minor. It's always been a fascination of mine, the powerful women history has tried to either forget or erase..."

"Ok so, if you're right, she's powerful, is she on our side or...?" Ward began, only to break off at the sudden shudder of the Bus.

"What the hell is going on?!" I barely managed to hold onto the holotable as the move nearly sent me sprawling.

"We're changing course." Melinda announced even as she ran to the cockpit, we all followed her, not knowing what else to do. "I've been overridden. Wherever we're going, there's nothing we can do to stop it."

We could all see her trying to take back control of the Bus, but nothing seemed to be working.

"Don't give up so soon." Darcy told her, holding her tablet. "Skye, I'm gonna need your help."

"Yes." I rushed to get my laptop and returned, ready to work.

The thing is, back then everyone knew I'd been part of the Rising Tide (technically speaking, I still was, it's not like I ever handed in a 'resignation'), they knew I was a hacker; but like most people who aren't hackers, they thought being one simply meant I was better than them at computers. They didn't understand the true extent of my abilities. Darcy did... Then again, she was the TaserQueen, the best hacker in the world, and I was pretty sure she'd already realized I was the BlueCloud, (arguably) the second best hacker in the world. There's no other reason for her to have known I'd be able to do my part when it came to hacking control of our plane back.

"We're going to need to do some counter-hacking on whoever has taken over the plane." She told me, even as I she began her part. "If we can find out who's doing this and why, good. But that's not our priority. We need to break their hold on this plane and make sure they'll never be able to take us over again."

"Got it." I nodded, settling and beginning to type as fast as humanly possible.

"Could this be related to what you were telling us?" Simmons asked suddenly.

Darcy actually stumbled in her typing, just for a fraction of a second, too briefly for anyone unfamiliar with her work to realize it... I did.

"Probably." She admitted after a moment. "The short of it is: Hydra isn't as dead and gone as we thought it was. What's more, it's apparently been hiding in SHIELD for a while, possibly from the start. That's why Fury was attacked, why Steve and Tasha are being pursued; I even got a message from Clint, he barely made it out of Poland; the man he was supposed to be making contact with tried to kill him out of the blue."

"Is Clint alright?" We could all tell AC was very worried.

"For now." She nodded, eyes still on her screen. "But it's hard to know where to go, who to trust, when you've just found out that Hydra has been infiltrating intelligence organizations and governments over the past fuck-knows-how-many years!"

And then, as if the whole situation weren't complicated enough already, as if we weren't hanging by a thread with stress, there was suddenly a voice coming in through the comms:

"Do you read? Do you read, 6-1-6?"

I knew that voice. It was that of Ward's old SO: John Garrett, he was one of the Agents who'd approved of my receiving my badge.

"Where's that coming from?" Fitz asked, looking around in confusion.

"Close." Simmons murmured, just as confused as he.

"Enemy aircraft on my tail. Over." Garrett's voice insisted.

"Garrett?" AC finally answered, I wondered if he hadn't realized who he was before then.

"Coulson, I'm under attack." Garrett went on. "Drones. Repeat, S.H.I.E.L.D. drones are on my ass. We're not getting along. Do you copy?"

"Copy." AC replied. "Garrett, what's happening? We've lost control of our aircraft."

"Hell if I know." Garrett admitted. "Tell me you got guns on that thing. I'm coming to you."

AC quickly began giving instructions to Fitz, I wasn't paying much attention as Darcy and I had just gotten to the most important part of the hack. I couldn't help it, I let out a wordless cry of triumph as we finally got through the firewalls. We didn't even need to explain what had just happened. Everyone felt it the moment the plane shuddered for a second time as we stopped being pulled towards... wherever it was the signal originated from (I hadn't managed to get in, but knew Darcy might have managed it).

"Agent May, you'll have to take control." Darcy announced somewhat stoically. "I'm afraid that while Skye and I might have been able to wrench control back we've fully destroyed the auto-pilot in the process."

"That's alright." May said calmly as she took her seat. "As long as we're the ones who decide where we go, it's all absolutely fine."

I was just getting back my breath (insane, frenetic hacking like that tended to leave me somewhat breathless) when something else happened (because we weren't up to our eyeballs in trouble already, of course something else had to happen).

"Sir..." Ward called suddenly, tone more serious than I'd ever heard from him before. "Sir, you cannot let John on this plane."

"And why is that Agent Ward?" AC asked, tension in his voice.

I raised my head then, just in time to catch Grant's eyes, he was looking straight at me, with an odd expression I'd never seen before on him, suddenly I had a very bad feeling...

"Because he's Hydra, sir. John Garrett is the Clairvoyant..."

For two seconds no one said a single word and then:

"What?!" We were all absolutely shocked.

"Get out of here." May snapped abruptly. "I have a plane to pilot and you need to settle this." She turned her head just a bit. "Orders regarding Garrett?"

"Sir," Ward called, quietly, empty hands open and raised showing he was unarmed. "You asked me who the real Clarivoyant was, who had ordered me to shoot Nash. The answer to both questions is John Garrett. For your own good, and of the rest of the team, you cannot let him on this plane! Please!"

I blinked, I wasn't sure if I'd ever heard Ward saying please before... still, I didn't dare say a word, instead turned to AC and Darcy, who seemed to be having a whole conversation just by looking straight at each other...

"Take us higher May." Phil ordered after what seemed like forever. "As high as the Bus can go, higher than any other craft can handle." He turned to a side. "Fitz, jam all our communications. From this moment on, it's just us. No one outside of this team is to be trusted. This is very important, and might be the only thing that saves our lives..."

"What about those on the team?" Mike brought everyone's attention back to Ward.

It was until then that I noticed he had his gun in hand, and I had no doubt that if anyone so much as moved funny, he'd start shooting.

At Darcy's signal we all got out of the cabin and soon found ourselves back in the main area. The video of the fight earlier in DC was still playing on the screen on a loop. Everyone went to take positions, and I couldn't help but notice that they were all purposefully standing as far from Ward as possible, to the point where he was standing alone on the far side of the room. He didn't even seem surprised, just resigned. I took a deep breath and, not allowing myself to think about what I was going to do, I crossed the room and went to stand beside him, projecting as much ease as I possibly could.

"Skye!" Several voiced called at the same time, even Ward's.

"I trusted you before, and I trust you now." I said calmly, looking straight into his eyes. "Nothing has changed..."

"That's bull!" Fitz, surprisingly, was the one to snap first.

"Everything has changed." Simmons complimented him, as always. "He's a traitor."

"Is he?" I challenged them. "Because from where I'm standing, he probably just saved our lives!"

"Garret was his SO." Simmons muttered.

"And Ward knew, knew who he was, what he'd done..." Fitz broke off, though by the way he looked at my stomach no one could miss what he was thinking.

"You cannot do that." Surprisingly enough, Darcy spoke up before I could. "You cannot judge someone by the person who trained them, or their parents. My biological father is on the FBI's most wanted list a suspected terrorist, that doesn't mean shit where I'm concerned. I'm still who I am, I'm still an Agent. Loki's own birth-father is the cruelest, most blood-thirsty bastard in Jotunheim, probably in all the realms, yet he's not evil..."

"Look." Grant interfered, voice quiet but strong. "I... I understand you doubting me, you not wanting to believe me. Cannot say I'd be any different in your place. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I wasn't supposed to care. When I came here, I had a mission..."

"What?!" Demanded Simmons. "Kill us all?!"

"Find out how he's alive!" Grant retorted, a bit more forceful than necessary, pointing straight at AC. "John is dying, has been for years, and he thinks Coulson holds the key to his survival."

"Oh..." AC nodded, as if suddenly understanding it all.

"The thing in Malta..." Darcy was the only one who seemed to be able to keep up right then. "The assassination attempt..."

"He was set up." Grant explained bluntly. "And when he was reported dead... they thought that was it. And then he was seen back in HQ..." He turned to AC. "Few people saw you, yes, but John was one of them. He's gotten it into his head that you were dead and somehow came back, and he wants to know how you did it."

"And you supported him..." AC murmured, but it didn't sound accusing, not exactly, more like someone waiting for an explanation.

"John, I..." Ward closed his eyes tightly.

I couldn't help myself, I took his hands in mine, applying just enough pressure for it to be soothing, or so I hoped.

"Skye..." He breathed out.

I just smiled at him softly, not knowing what else to say, or do, somehow that seemed to be enough as he went back to his explanation.

"I owe John everything I have, everything I am." He said quietly. "He got me out of Juvie and into SHIELD, he gave me a chance when no one else gave a damn about me. When everyone chose to believe my 'perfect family', chose to think that I was unbalanced, and that was why I'd ran away from the military academy, went home, and then set it on fire, with my big brother Christian inside..."

"You did what?!" FitzSimmons almost shrieked.

"What really happened?" I asked him very softly, trying to get him to focus on me, rather than on anyone else's accusations.

"I used to have a sister, you know?" He said, as if out of the blue. "Her name was Emma. She wasn't my sister by birth. It was just us boys: Christian was the oldest, then there was me, and lastly Thomas. He was the baby of the family, and our mother's favorite... and yet, she'd always wanted a daughter. So they took one in, an orphan girl, beautiful like a little princess. I loved her, almost as much as Thomas. Mother loved playing with her, dressing her up and doing her hair and all that, didn't care for anything else. But Emma didn't seem to mind; she endured Mother's quirks, and had fun with us... Christian, of course, didn't like it. It was someone else to take attention away from him. One day he was especially angry, and he tried to take it out on Thomas, Emma intervened. She fought Christian to protect Thomas, she did it when even I was too afraid to do anything. She managed to make a cut on Christian's brow, deep enough that even now he still has the scar... Christian in turn threw her out a window."

"What?!" Everyone's shock was evident.

"Christian of course told everyone that I'd done it, and they believed him because he was the perfect son, the one that could do no wrong." Ward grimaced. "So Emma was sent back to the orphanage, and I to military school. I was going to let it go, you know? As far as I was concerned I was much better there. I would stay in that school until eighteen, and then I would leave, and never again would I have to see my so-called family... Until Thomas called me, he said Mother had whined until she got her way. They were going to try and adopt another girl. They even had someone in mind already, another girl much like Emma, who'd never been adopted, though younger, because it was what mother wanted... I couldn't allow it. It was bad enough that I could never do enough to protect Thomas, that I couldn't help Emma... Next time Christian might just kill someone, I couldn't allow that." He shook his head almost ruefully. "I couldn't even do that right. The fire moved too slow, let out too much smoke, the emergency services arrived too fast. Christian got out and I got sent to Juvie; they wanted to try me as an adult, for both arson and attempted murder..."

"Why didn't your little brother defend you, your father?" Fitz asked, horrified.

"Thomas knew that if he did anything, Christian would turn against him next, and father... all he cared was about keeping his image, his political career." Ward spat. "I have no idea what they were told when John got me out of Juvie, but either they don't know I'm in SHIELD or they simply don't care, as long as I don't do something to ruin their 'perfect' lives..."

"Why didn't we know any of this?" Darcy wanted to know. "Your files..."

"They've been doctored." Ward said straight away. "There's nothing of what really happened on any file, anywhere... even the Queen of Hackers cannot find what doesn't exist."

Once it was all said, no one knew quite what to say; even Simmons, who'd been the most verbally vicious, and Mike, with weapon in hand, didn't seem to know what to do.

"Look, I didn't tell you all this so you would pity me, or want to save me." Ward went on. "If you still think I cannot be trusted, then don't trust me. Cross me off, if that's what you feel is right..."

There was a pained exclamation, and it took me a second or two to realize it'd come from me. Ward ignored me completely, he was looking straight at AC. "I care not what happens to me. Life, death, haven't meant much to me in a very long time. I just... I just want you to stay safe, whatever it takes."

"You cannot... you cannot just kill him!" Fitz exclaimed, scandalized.

"SHIELD protocols are very clear on what must be done when someone betrays their team, they're to be bagged and tagged, sent straight to one of the black-sites for interrogation." AC announced, more coldly than I'd ever heard him.

"Except that it's impossible to know which of those locations are really SHIELD's, and which are Hydra's." Darcy added grimly.

"Hydra...?" That one took most of us by surprise.

"They're embedded in SHIELD." Ward elaborated. "Have been for a long time, perhaps even from the start..."

"They have been from the start." Darcy announced darkly. "Zola, the psycho Nazi scientist? He was recruited by the American government after the war. He brought Hydra into SHIELD. His consciousness was eventually uploaded into a computer, it..." She shook her head. "Steve and Tasha found it yesterday... or would that be the day before yesterday?" It was past midnight. "Anyway, they almost got killed. It's why SHIELD is after them... except it's not really SHIELD, but Hydra. And it goes to the very top. Alexander Pierce is one of their leaders, possibly the highest one. Project Insight is their master plan. They will use those helicarriers to eliminate Hydra's enemies, a few million at a time..."

"But that... that..." I had no words.

"It'll be a massacre." Mike finished for me. "And they will most likely start with us."

"Captain America will not allow that." AC stated.

"No, he won't." Darcy agreed. "And neither will we."

I could hardly believe it when I heard. It was obvious Natasha (the Black Widow!) hadn't told Darcy quite everything, but they'd shared enough. The Captain would lead a small group of those loyal to him into the Triskellion, including most of the people we'd seen in the last video; they'd stop Project Insight no matter what.

Also, apparently Hydra went a lot farther than that, but they were ready for that too. Alliances had been in place for years, and once the Captain acted, that would be the signal for everyone else to do the same. Our mission? To make sure the rest of the world got the signal... and to pick up on things once Natasha started the hack on the Triskellion's databases; she'd be working on erasing everything, for safety reasons. Darcy would be working to get everything about Hydra we might need to go after those who might survive the first strike; and she wanted my help to do it. Of course I said yes.

"There's only one question left then," Darcy announced solemnly, looking straight as my SO. "What do we do with you?"

Ward didn't say anything at first, he just looked at me, and there was such intensity in his gaze. I kept watching him as his lips traced two words: 'Thank You', then he went to stand before Darcy, before dropping to his knees, hands down, head bowed, and waited.

Instead of taking the opportunity offered, Darcy actually backed down so fast she almost tripped. Mike's hold on his weapon tightened but he didn't approach. I watched as AC's hand moved... I didn't even wait to see if he'd reach for his gun, or something else entirely, I practically used the holotable as a springboard, flipping over it before landing in front of my SO, arms extended, I covered him with my body.

"Skye!" Practically every voice in the Bus cried out at the same time.

I didn't know what I was doing it, what was making me do it; it was insane, had I no sense of self-preservation? But no, I couldn't keep lying to myself, I knew exactly what I was doing, and why I was doing it; and self-preservation was irrelevant, because I just knew I would never survive without him. At some point, without me really noticing, Grant Ward had become my life... it was too late to turn back anymore.

"What are you doing Skye?" AC asked, tense.

"Move away!" Mike ordered, gun raised.

"No!" I was almost shaking, but I forced myself to stand my ground; I truly believed they would not shoot me, they cared about me; I wasn't too sure about Ward, though.

"Skye, move aside, please..." Ward whispered behind me, obvious pain in his voice.

"No." I insisted.

"I'm not worth it." He practically hissed. "I'm not a good man Skye..."

That made me react, I spun around before dropping to my knees before him, embracing him tightly, making sure to keep my body between him and any guns.

"Maybe because no one has given you the chance before..." I whispered, then revised. "But I do believe you're a good man Grant." He was Grant, not Ward, he was nothing like those monsters he called family. "You've protected us, time and again. Even now, you broke your cover, are willing to lay down your life. Just to make sure we're safe..." I turned over my shoulder to look at AC. "You told me once you believed in second chances? Where is his then?"

"Do you realize what you're doing?" AC asked me, completely serious. "Do you realize what you're asking of me?"

"SHIELD will never stand for it." Simmons added, though she sounded almost apologetic.

"That won't be a problem after tomorrow." Darcy offered. "Hydra is too deeply inside SHIELD. It all goes. Hydra and SHIELD. Captain's orders."

"So what?" Fitz wanted to clarify. "It'll be just us."

"Not much different from how it's now then." Darcy drawled. "It's been 'just us' practically since the beginning, really."

"Do you really trust him that much Skye?" AC asked me, so very softly...

"With my life and soul." I wasn't sure why I chose those exact words, it just seemed important somehow. "I do."

"Very well." AC nodded. "He'll be your responsibility then." He turned to Darcy. "Now, about the Captain's plans for Hydra and SHIELD."

Most people would have never understood it. The way everything seemed to change in an instant: from judging Grant's betrayal to us suddenly all being a team again, getting ready to help Captain America in any way we could. Even May, once she got into the conversation (through the comms because she couldn't leave the cockpit) didn't seem really surprised at Grant being with us.

 **xXx**

I'm quite sure no one slept more than a couple of hours at most that night. Plans had been made: May and Grant were taking turns being in charge of the piloting (mainly to make sure everyone had the chance to rest at some point), Simmons was keeping an eye over them. AC and Phil were on guard; while we had spent the night at such altitude nothing bar a nuke could possibly reach us, in order to access the internet we'd need to get lower, which would in turn make us all quite vulnerable; they were ready to turn all the plane's guns on whoever came after us. Fitz had connected Darcy's and my personal laptop's directly into the Bus's computer to give us more capacity and processing speed; we'd probably need it, as we'd have but minutes to get as much as we could before it was all gone. I'd also explained to him how to pass everything we got into my personal heavily encrypted storage cloud; we'd be leaving nothing on any physical hard-drives, it was safer that way. Finally, Darcy and I'd be hacking... it was likely to be even more insane than the last time (and we still had no idea of what might have happened in the Hub when Hand realized we wouldn't be arriving... or to Garrett when we left him there).

The one thing we never agreed on, though, was what exactly was to be the signal that we were meant to re-transmit... none of us had the slightest idea and yet... once we heard Captain America begin his speech, Darcy and I didn't even have to think about it, in seconds we were sending it forward, copying it into every corner of the web, every signal, making the whole world stop and listen to the man who'd always be known as the first ever super-hero:

"Attention, all SHIELD agents. This is Steve Rogers. You've heard a lot about me over the last few days, some of you were even ordered to hunt me down. But I think it's time you know the truth. SHIELD is not what we thought it was, it's been taken over by HYDRA. Alexander Pierce is their leader. The STRIKE and Insight crew are HYDRA as well. I don't know how many more, but I know they're in the building. They could be standing right next to you. They almost have what they want: absolute control. They shot Nick Fury and it won't end there. If you launch those Helicarriers today, HYDRA will be able to kill anyone that stands in their way, unless we stop them. I know I'm asking a lot, but the price of freedom is high, it always has been, and it's a price I'm willing to pay. And if I'm the only one, then so be it. But I'm willing to bet I'm not."

No, he wasn't, we all agreed on that, and I was quite sure so would many more people around the world. And so a new kind of war began, the purpose wasn't to save SHIELD, it wasn't even about Hydra itself; no, it was much simpler, and much more absolute than that: protect.

We got a few drones attacking us, but nothing we couldn't handle. Though still, by the time we were done with them we were running low on fuel, which meant that other decisions needed to be made, and quickly.

"Well, we're running out of time." May announced. "We need to land in the next 12 hours, and before that we need to decide what we're going to do next and where we're going to go."

Mike was keeping things under control in the cockpit, having assured us that he'd go wherever we chose. And once the situation with Hydra was under control he planned on taking off to see his family (either permanently or as a sort-of vacation he hadn't decided yet).

"It won't be an easy decision to make." AC reminded us. "We still have no idea what bases might be secure, and even with those they might be..."

"They will not take too kindly to me." Grant finished for him.

"Would they really know you were with... them?" Fitz asked.

"You can say it, that I'm a traitor, that I was Hydra." Grant nodded.

"You're not a traitor." I blurted out before I could think better of it.

"I'm not loyal to SHIELD either." Grant admitted with a shrug. "I've never been..." He paused before adding, completely honest: "I'm loyal to this team."

My smile was blinding.

"Yes well, the point still remains." Darcy stated. "We need to find a safe place to land, and quite probably somewhere to lay low. Whether we choose to join the war against Hydra or not, we will still need some place safe to at least rest for a little while..."

No one said anything, I knew that at least May, AC and Darcy were probably considering and discarding safe-houses and any other location they might think of. That line of thought brought an image to the forefront of my mind: the desert, a big house with a wrap around porch and flowers of all kinds taking one fraction of the huge land...

"I know a place where we can go." The words left my lips before I quite knew what I was saying.

 **xXx**

It was still early in the morning when we landed in Luna County, NM; the sun just beginning to rise in the distance. We'd eaten something on the Bus, but I was hoping we might be able to buy better things for lunch.

"Oh wow..." FitzSimmons breathed out upon seeing the place.

I just smiled as I reached into the right potted plant and pulled out the emergency key.

"Does this place belong to you Skye?/Who does this place belong to?" Several of them asked me at the same time.

"It's not mine, not really." I admitted with a slight shrug. "It belongs to someone I know and trust. I know she won't mind us crashing here for a while."

I knew they were quite shocked just seeing the size of the house. It was, indeed, big, like the old ranch houses from the civil war era, with a wrap-around porch and actual benches, couches, chairs and even a wide swing. I knew their shock would only grow when they saw the inside:

"I don't know how many of the services might still be active right now." I announced as I opened the door. "Suppose it depends on when the place was last used."

"How close are we to any towns?" May asked.

I knew she had her doubts about the place, she had ever since realizing the property didn't appear on any maps, not even satellite imaging. She didn't understand who could have enough power and authority to get that kind of protection on the place, and considering the whole Hydra-thing I understood her reticence. I knew we were safe there, though.

"We're a little under two hours away from Las Cruces." I explained to her. "That's north-east of here. And between an hour, and an hour and a half from two other, smaller towns, those are north-west and west of here."

"So we'll be able to eat real food!" Simmons exclaimed brightly.

"Only if you have cash." Darcy informed them. "It's not a good idea to use any cards, or anything else that could possibly be traced until the whole mess with Hydra is over."

"There might be some cash stashed around here." I offered. "And clothes."

There might even be food but, since I hadn't the slightest idea when there had last been someone at the ranch, it was impossible to be sure about that last one. It was better to plan on a trip to one of the towns, though. Mainly I was thinking of Las Cruces, I actually knew the place (had never forgotten it, despite of how long it'd been...).

It was amazing, how deeply connected I still felt to Las Cruces, and especially to the ranch, despite how long it'd been. To the point that I'd actually put on my royal-blue plaid button up along with jeans that morning. That shirt... it was the oldest thing I owned (more miracle than anything else that it hadn't fallen apart already), it was also probably my favorite garment, for reasons not many would understand...

My mind was running rampant with memories and plans for a trip to the city, and how to answer the questions I had no doubt the team must be compiling, when we all heard the sound of the front door opening... I spun around instantly and I saw the newcomer step inside. For a moment it felt like diving into the past, other than the different clothes and the fact that her long hair was a dark auburn instead of the black I was used to, she looked exactly as I remembered her. I couldn't help it, in an instant I was throwing myself at her, holding her tight:

"Mom!" I cried out automatically.

"Oh my darling..." Her own arms folded around me immediately.

It would be impossible to tell how long exactly we stood there, just holding tight onto each other; it felt like forever and hardly any time at all, a part of me never wanted to let go... not again, not when it had taken fifteen years for us to be reunited...

"I've missed you so much..." I breathed out quietly.

"Me too darling, more than you could ever imagine." She assured me.

I couldn't help but remember the times I'd either said or used similar words: referring to my own imaginations about my birth-parents, and when AC told me what he'd learnt from Agent Lumley... so maybe some things did surpass my imagination, still.

"I have a pretty good imagination." I quipped with a half smile.

"Wait a second," Fitz called abruptly. "Did you say mom?!"

"I thought you were an orphan." Simmons said bluntly, before wincing. "Sorry."

"It's okay." I assured her, understanding her shock. "I didn't lie."

"I'm not her mother by birth." Mom clarified as she slowly broke our embrace (much as I didn't want to). "But Skye is the daughter of my heart, and she always will be."

I smiled brightly at that, she was the mother of my heart too.

"You once told me you'd only ever called one woman mom, she's the one." Grant said right then, once again understanding me like few people did.

"Yes." I nodded, before elaborating a bit (mostly for the rest of the team). "She was my foster mom for six months, back in 2001..."

"Why only six months?" May asked, she seemed the most distrustful.

"Because as far as the law was concerned I was a 21 year old, recently graduated nurse about to lose her job due to the budget cuts in the hospital." Mom said quietly. "I was also single. All in all, they didn't believe I was the right person to raise an impressionable little girl..."

"There was also the protocol Agent Avery had put in place." I offered evenly.

I could still remember when AC had told me about that, it had made me cry so hard, like never before. And not for anything bad. The realization that it had never really been about people not wanting me, it had all been for my own protection...

"If I'd known you were in danger, any kind of danger, I'd have never let you go, you know that right?" Mom said, suddenly very serious.

"I know." I nodded.

I believed her. I had no idea how she'd have managed it exactly, but had no doubt she would have found a way. It was just the kind of person she was, one of the many reasons why I loved her so much... (if I was honest with myself, I wasn't sure even my birth-mom could love me as much as she did, and I wasn't sure what that meant).

"Who are you?" AC inquired, he sounded honestly curious.

"Right!" I almost slapped myself at the realization that I'd forgotten that part. "Haven't made the introductions. Mom, this is my team: Mike Peterson, Leo Fitz, Jemma Simmons... we call them FitzSimmons because they're always together. Then there are the Agents: Darcy Lewis, Melinda May, the boss: Agent Phil Coulson; I call him AC because his initials, and because he's cool." I felt giddy, finally getting the chance to introduce some of the most important people in my life to each other, it was a dream come true. "And my awesome SO: Grant." I paused, as I considered something. "Wait, are we even Agents, still, with SHIELD going boom and all that?" I shook my head, deciding to think it over later. "Anyway, team, this is my mom, nurse Rosalie Nova... her friends call her Sally."

Mom smiled at that, throwing an arm around my shoulder, which only made me smile even more, she seemed to be sharing my desire to keep touching, to make sure I (we) wasn't dreaming, it had just been so long...

"You were twenty one when she was a little girl, yet you seem to have hardly aged since." May pointed out, she seemed a touch paranoid.

"Yeah." Mom nodded calmly. "I don't quite age the way humans do."

"I knew it!" I cried out in delight (I was right!) "I knew you were older than you looked. With the way you were always talking about your sister and her kids... Your name isn't Rosalie, is it?"

"It's a name I've used, one I've greatly enjoyed." She shrugged, somewhat carelessly. "But no, it's not the one I was born with."

"Who are you really?" Darcy asked.

"And what are you?" May asked at the same time.

I almost snapped at that, not liking the insinuation, though mom didn't seem too affected by it.

"That sounds almost insulting." She sounded more theatrical than truly offended. "I was born in this world, to parents from other realms, other races." She made a pause before adding. "I was born Rose Alfdis in 1949... you might have a better idea of who I am, if I tell you that most of the world has known me by one name: the Rose of Chaos..."

I could hardly believe what I was hearing. The Rose of Chaos... my mom was a living legend! One of the most powerful gifted in the world, a warrior, a defender of the rights of those more than human! A part of me really wanted to squeal like a little girl. What she had just said... it went beyond my wildest dreams, of one day my parents appearing telling me that they really loved me, always had and were forced to leave to protect me... Mom might not have given birth to me, but I'd chosen her as much as she'd chosen me and that made things all the more special, somehow.

She told us her story, or at least the short version of it. I was in awe of her, that a woman like her wanted me as her daughter... I could see AC, May and Grant didn't quite believe her, and the others had their doubts, but I trusted they'd see the truth eventually. I trusted her without a doubt.

"You're awesome mom!" I told her brightly, still feeling so giddy, like I couldn't fully contain the emotion inside my body. "I mean, even back when I was little I knew you were, but you're a lot more awesome than I'd imagined. You're a hero!"

"So are you..." She said, caressing my cheek tenderly. "It's not the powers that make a hero, darling, it's what you do with them. I've known people without even the smallest gift, who've done amazing things. One might even say that it's harder, doing the things we all do, without anything extra to help. Yet you do it, all of you."

I knew I was blushing and ducked my head in embarrassment.

"There's one thing I don't understand." Grant said suddenly, very serious. "If you're Skye's mom, if you love her, why didn't you look for her?"

"Grant!" I called in shock. "You really shouldn't say that! It's not her fault, I understand..."

"It's okay Skye..." She assured me. "He's right. I left you, I let you go and I shouldn't have."

"But you couldn't help it." I said, hating how a part of me wondered if that was the truth or if I'd made it up. "Miss Matthews didn't think you were the right kind of person to look after me, and you couldn't explain things to her, it was no one's fault. That's what you said..."

"I wasn't lying." She assured me. "But while there's nothing I could have done in that moment, I could have done something later on. When I was living in Kansas, had a job, a stable life... I could have looked for you, could have sought to adopt you... and I didn't."

"Why not?" I asked, sounding so weak even to my own ears...

"Because I was a coward." She admitted. "I was afraid to go looking for you and finding that you had a new family, that you didn't need me. As long as I stayed away I could imagine things were different. And then... later on I got into some troubles, and I had to fight, and I couldn't help but think that maybe that's why I didn't get to keep you, because in the end I will always be a warrior, and I had no right to subject a child to that kind of life..."

"I would have had you, and that would have been enough." I murmured.

I didn't want her to feel bad, I really didn't, yet a part of me couldn't help but wonder how different things might have been...

"If one of my enemies had harmed you..." She broke off for a moment and I wondered what she might really be thinking. "I'd have never forgiven myself."

The conversation ended there, and no one insisted anymore.

 **xXx**

The rest of the day was just a bit less eventful. A truck arrived with enough groceries to last us a week, and mom got a call and a bunch of messages warning her that the battles had begun. It was then we learned the part of the truth we'd been missing. How the message we'd sent forward had been for more than just SHIELD.

I'm sure we all got mixed feelings. As disheartening as it was to learn just how far and wide Hydra's power and influence went, learning that there were just as many people ready to fight them... people my mom had helped make into allies... She was just awesome!

Of course we wanted to do our part too. Even FitzSimmons, who weren't field agents at all and were easily scared, they wanted to be brave, were ready to help us fight.

Soon we had a plan. Grant knew where Centipede was based, it was connected to the company we'd been investigating in Italy (where Quinn almost killed me): Cybertech. It was right there in New Mexico. So I did some hacking, got us some blueprints, strategies were discussed and then we were off, agents (if we could even still call ourselves that) ready to do our part in changing the world... and kicking some asses (May's choice of words).

It was just what we needed, another mission, a new chance to be a team. Hydra might have destroyed SHIELD, but it hadn't destroyed us, and it never would, we wouldn't allow it, because we were strong. We were a team... we were a family.

The mission was awesome, and insane, and terrifying. It felt great, working all together, seeing what we were all truly capable of; I nearly lost it when Grant took that bullet for me and ended on the ground, bleeding out, I didn't even pay attention when mom went and incinerated the bastard who'd shot him (Garrett) to kingdom come. No, all my focus was on Grant, on finding some way for him to be saved. And then mom came through for us again, when she called her own mom! And really, Loki and his Nightingale were her parents, just how awesome was that?!

Then, as if things weren't eventful enough by that point, it just kept piling up. I'd always believed my necklace was special, it was the only thing I had from before getting to St. Agnes, it had never broken or damaged, it looked almost new, even after more than twenty years; and while I had no idea what most of the engravings on it meant, having it on me still gave me some comfort.

And then it turned out that the newcomers recognized the necklace; and not only that, they'd given it to me, because they were my godparents! That was the day I learnt that I'd been born Daisy Johnson to Calvin and Jiaying Johnson in the Hunan Province, China, on July 2nd of 1992 (and hey! I was right to think I was older than the nuns claimed I was! A whole 6 months older!). No one had the slightest idea of where my parents were, other than the village where I was born was like a ghost town (something I could have imagined, after what Agent Lumley had revealed). Both Loki and Nightingale seemed to be feeling quite guilty, like they'd failed my parents, failed me. I didn't see how; it's not like they chose to abandon me. They didn't know I would need them, had no idea that anything was wrong. And they couldn't stay (no specific explanations were given on why they hadn't been able to; but they were good people, of course there had to be a good reason for it all). So I assured them I didn't blame them:

"I don't regret it." I told them calmly. "I might have, in the past, when I was young and insecure, and so afraid that no one wanted me, that no one ever would... But if I hadn't gone through all that, I wouldn't be here today; wouldn't be part of this amazing team, this family... I could never regret that. And if going through all that was the price to be here, right now... then I will never regret everything I've lived. It's made me who I am after all..."

Mom embraced me, kissed my hair; and just for that moment everything was definitely worth it.

At some point, I couldn't be sure when exactly, I got it into my head that we needed a new name. It was probably before we ever went to Smallville and met that particular branch of mom's family (and there were so many amazing people there I began feeling like I needed more adjectives, if only so descriptions wouldn't sound so repetitive at least inside my own head). So, I thought we needed a new name. We weren't Agents of SHIELD anymore, because there was no SHIELD anymore (and by the spirits, did Fury seem to be angry about that!), but we were still a team, a family in our own way; and we deserved a name. After all if the Justice League, the Avengers, the X-Men... and so many others got to have cool names why shouldn't we?

Also, according to Mama, names were important. Especially because, when the work was done right, they might last longer than those who bore it. Like the Valkyrie, who was still talked about in some circles even though there had been no official news from her since WWII. And the JSA...

When it finally came to me it was almost a surprise, and yet it seemed so obvious in retrospect. A word that represented what we were, what we fought for, what we believed in.

"Sentinels." I said out loud, testing the word on my tongue.

"What was that?" Grant inquired.

Ever since what had happened we were always together. We hadn't said anything, made no declarations, but they didn't seem to be needed either.

"The name for our team." I explained. "A name that explains what we are..."

"Sentinels." He repeated, pondering the word. "I like it."

I smiled brightly, enjoying his approval and then... I didn't even think about it, I just kissed him because, why not? It was a whole new world, new lives, a new name for our team. It reminded me of my past, my time living in the back of my van, touching so many lives while remaining completely alone, and the particular podcast that started it all; there had been some words I'd said that day, that kept proving true every single day that passed...

 _This world is full of wonders..._

* * *

So, did you like it?

First things first, the Emma mentioned here twice is the same: Emma Swan (yes, she's also the girl the Wards had taken in, whom Christian almost killed). She doesn't belong to me, is one of the main characters of Once Upon a Time... which isn't really that important is this verse, as I'd mentioned before. She probably won't be appearing again. I just found her convenient for the two scenes where she appears, particularly for the similarities between her story and Skye's. Also, I'm not sure if anyone picked up on this, but while I didn't study years strictly, at least in my head, the girl the Wards would have adopted after Emma was gone, would have been Mary (Skye)... in my head this was also when she was with Rose. When the attempt fell through (because of the fire Grant caused) Miss Matthews took the papers for Rose to officially foster the girl. So, you see, it's all connected!

Lorna and Matthew are minor connections which I might or might not go back to in the future. Lorna is easy enough, or she will be once she's out of jail... Matt would be a bit harder, considering I haven't watched a single episode of Daredevil. I only read enough in wiki timelines to be able to fit him here (he seems to be working in the fringes of a number of my stories... seeing how he was in the background during the trials where Hakon and Nina were the main lawyers...).

So, what do you think about my portrayal of Grant? There have been times when I didn't like him, to be honest. When it all began I was with Skyeward, mostly because it seemed obvious, then it became too obvious, almost boring. Then he turned out to be a traitor, and I hated him, and then... then that episode when Phil brought the team together to help Skye... it was then that my faith in him, in all of them was restored. It was also then that I decided Skyeward was It. So then I had to decide how to handle it here. I originally considered having Hakon find him, either in juvie or in the woods, talk to him, make him into a spy with Garrett and Hydra... but as interesting as I'm sure that would have been, in the end I decided it wasn't right, because I wanted Grant to choose Skye, I wanted it to be about her, not about Hakon... and so here we are. I hope you liked what I've done with him. Grant definitely deserved a lot more than he got in canon, and this time I chose to give it to him. Go Skyeward!

What's next? Oh right, I told you I'd explain about the titles... well, I think Sentinels is obvious enough. I wanted them to use a name that meant something, wasn't a common word, yet fit. As for why they couldn't be SHIELD anymore... I believe I've said it before, and I'll say it again, I don't like how Phil changed when he became Director, and while I'm quite sure Darcy would never allow that to happen here, I decided to go a different route this time (I think I'm honestly the first person to fully bin SHIELD); Sentinels is their team and they'll be much like the Justice League, or the X-Men, a team on their own, though allied with other superheroes.

On the topic of the chapter titles. I actually originally considered rebuilding SHIELD into a new organization. I know the comics has SWORD... and while that'd have been a great joke, in the end it didn't satisfy me. In the end I put Darcy down as the Shield because she was the SHIELD Agent, more so than Skye, being the 'Shadow of SHIELD' she was the epitome of the SHIELD Agent, I think. Skye was the Sword because she went beyond the Shield, she didn't focus on protecting, or at least not just that, she was proactive, a woman of action. In the end, neither approach could ever be enough, they both had to evolve (and everyone else with them). Hope I explained myself alright and didn't confuse you all further...

So, like I said in the first ANs, NEXT WEEK we're going back to BOUQUET OF ROSES. We have two more chapters to go there, and then it's done. It's also when we'll finally go into the 'Sequel' part of "Companion and Sequel" that I'd mentioned before. Some of you might already have an idea of what's coming, some might now... wanna try and guess? Anyway, two more chapters on BoR and then that particular fic is finished; but not this arc of Nightingale, not just yet. There's another story, a three-piece one I'll be posting afterwards, it's called "Ethereal Gift" and will focus a lot on Helena (she's the only one who hasn't been given much of a chance to tell her story thus far, and I find her so fascinating! (at least the version I've twisted to fit my purposes and the purposes of this verse)), it's also where we'll finally see how Dr. Strange and other human sorcerers fit this universe. Hope you'll enjoy it. We'll get there.

See ya next week!


End file.
